mission thread
- Locked due to inactivity on Jan 4, '21 3:54am
Thread Topic: mission thread
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so i'm thinking why i'm still bad after a month of doing this
and i thought if i wrote the individual things, i can structure it better
so
the people talking in the hall all day
the people who visit me
the space i have is small
no garden
the way stuff exists like stuff dying and not working and breaking
no one to talk to me
he never holds me
sometimes i don't know what to do, like i have no interests
not being in a mansion
i feel alone and scared
i feel like everything's mean and sometimes it feels like he's not helping
he won't help or talk to me if i don't feel good??
i can't be myself because of the people
i feel like i have to generate everything :(
not being able to talk to anyone because everyone's mean
i mean i know i need to move but i can't yet so i'm gonna think about how to fix some of these -
the people talking in the hall all day
the people who visit me
the space i have is small
no garden
the way stuff exists like stuff dying and not working and breaking <<i find this one really hard, i mean everything's dead
no one to talk to me << i think i'm dealing with this one better lately but the mental state i have from it is really bad
he never holds me <<idk
sometimes i don't know what to do, like i have no interests << i find this scary sometimes
not being in a mansion
i feel alone and scared
i feel like everything's mean and sometimes it feels like he's not helping
he won't help or talk to me if i don't feel good??
i can't be myself because of the people
i feel like i have to generate everything :(
not being able to talk to anyone because everyone's mean -
i mean i feel like i've got nothing to do in a dead world with zombies
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so basically i feel like i'm in a dead zombie world with nothing to do
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day 37
idk i mean i think i didn't feel good because he wasn't around
well i felt bad
scared and crazy as usual
i feel like he's not with me atm but idk i don't want him to get upset either??? because i think he was getting upset when i was thinking about him
idk i don't feel good
i felt like a supernatural person like not normal -
i mean i've tried everything and i'm still struggling 🤔
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day 38
idk what to say -
39
idk -
40
idk -
41
well i felt better
but i still feel weird
i still feel bad
i don't really know :/ -
42
🎶
idk i mean i've been like pretty tired or overtired all day
decided going to the shop on my own is maybe good for strengthening
well i still feel bad
still need to leave
waiting for a house i guess -
43
-
44
its hard to know how to write this
its hard to know what it is -
45
idk i mean i don't really feel like i did anything today
i've got the tiredness feeling back though -
the people talking in the hall all day
the people who visit me
the space i have is small
no garden
the way stuff exists like stuff dying and not working and breaking
no one to talk to me
he never holds me
sometimes i don't know what to do, like i have no interests
not being in a mansion
i feel alone and scared
i feel like everything's mean and sometimes it feels like he's not helping
he won't help or talk to me if i don't feel good??
i can't be myself because of the people
i feel like i have to generate everything :(
not being able to talk to anyone because everyone's mean <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< i don't feel like this anymore
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