Venting Thread
- Locked by Carri04 on Oct 29, '23 9:13pmReason: Sorry you gotta deal with this.
Thread Topic: Venting Thread
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There's this one person that I kinda miss but I gotta remember why we don't talk in the first place
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Plus, I feel like letting go of them is better for my mental health cuz that's the one thing I'm focusing on even if I do get sidetracked by issues and emotions at times
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I woke up from a bad dream at 5 in the morning and ended up freaking out and have trouble breathing. Even a little while ago, I had trouble breathing and been feeling a lil off and depressed so idk. Life just sucks as usual and I've still been feeling lonely. Not like that's important but yk
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Okay so umm, it's confirmed, my mom is dating somebody. I kinda figured it was the person it is and he's pretty chill but like, something that makes me feel a lil uncomfortable about him is that he looks exactly like my dad and shares the same last name as him... and I do want my mom to be in a serious relationship and get married but at the same time, I'm scared and thinking "Mom, don't make the same mistake again" but hopefully, if things move forward, it'll be different. The guy still seems chill tho, my grandfather even met him too and likes him, and the guy thinks me and him will get along well and we kinda already have
(Idk, guess I'm just gonna call him "the guy" cuz idk what else to) -
It's likely not a good thing but I always get jealous whenever my sister be talking about her friends or of hanging with her friends, giving them gifts, them giving her gifts, etc. And Ik people love sharing their experiences when doing smth fun, with or without their friends, I get it, but I feel like she talks abt it for so long and overdoes things with it like bruh, I get it. You got friends while I'm lonely.
Plus, earlier today, I felt sad when one of our family friends only said hi to my sister and hugged her only (and other people who were there too except me). I was standing right by my sister, even said hi, but they didn't even bother to acknowledge me just like the rest of the world and went on to talk to my sister as I awkwardly stood nearby. This isn't even the first time smth like this happened. No one ever notices I exist with my sister around and it gets on my nerves. Plus, she's moving to my school very soon which upsets me, that's the one place that I don't have a sibling hogging attention. Not like I really got friends or anything, but still, I just want some space from her; a place to get away. And I do love my sister, but probably sound like a jerk when talking about this.
I just want to be acknowledged, sorry if that's too much to ask. Even today, we went out with other family friends and it was a whole group but ofc, I was the only one standing behind the rest of them and people can't say that it's bc I don't speak up or talk anymore. Sure, I am quiet but there are moments where I try to join in but everyone just forgets abt me or ignores me or don't take me seriously cuz I'm the youngest and still are seen as the same child from years ago. It's always like that wherever I go.
No one ever notices me. Everyone forgets my name or calls me "(My sister's name)'s little sister." No one misses me when I'm gone. And most of the time, I just feel invisible and lonely.
Sorry for going on a whole rant abt that but I'm just so upset and had to get that out. And I am happy my sis got friends and I don't mean to be attention seeking or anything but sometimes, I want to have people who genuinely care about me too, as much as I care abt them and have them notice me for once -
hey, I'm not sure if we know each other but I wanted to say if you need friends, you can find me on discord. up to you, just wanted to offer.
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Sorry for replying so late-- and I would say yes to the offer tbh, but I may not have this device for a while cuz of certain stuff goin' on irl so I won't really be able to have as much online access other than email. Thanks for the offer tho and maybe if I get a new device soon, then I'll be able to talk to you more along with some other people online
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Honestly been pretty upset all day and feel like my feelings or what I want (not item wise but yk) ain't ever valid cuz my mom always be agreeing with my sister over me and ofc, her opinion has to matter and as my mom told me, "what I want don't matter rn" so yk, feelings never valid and I gotta cry in the corner abt it
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Bruuuuh now I actually feel like crying too. What the heck
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My gtq birthday is coming next month but unfortunately, I'll probably not be on here by that time :(
But then again, I didn't exactly come onto gtq at that time, I think I made a first account then forgot the login for it so after that, I made this account months later-- if you want to get technical but yeah. I'm dumb and usually forget my passwords to stuff which is why I learned to write them down -
Dang, I'm gonna be so lonely once I lose this device. Sure, I don't got many friends online, only one, though I genuinely care about them and will miss them but unfortunately, due to things going on irl, I won't be able to come online like this so I'll just be completely lonely again but I'm hoping I could get a new device soon, maybe pay for a new one myself since I'm supposed to be getting some money soon
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I may no longer be online after this post but I'm not really sure yet. Not like anyone really cares and I'm not going to make it a big deal but either way, bye for now and hopefully, I'll get a new device soon or will find new ways to get on here.
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Nvm actually, I'll possibly be able to come online here and there but not for long since the time I do will be limited but eh, whatever I suppose
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Also, I've been realized this but I'm realizing again that me and my bf's one year anniversary of dating is coming up soon since we got together near the day of Valentines but idk if I'll be able to talk to him by then since he's been pretty busy and will be gone a while but yeah yk
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And my clingy self already misses him ngl, but until he gets back, I'm just going to focus on taking care of myself and working on my mental health since he asked me to
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