butt baby
- Locked due to inactivity on Mar 23, '22 3:54am
Thread Topic: butt baby
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I wish I was over exaggerating
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I'm either "I want to be with you forever"
Or
"I wouldn't care if you dropped dead, actually I'd be better off" -
But no cap I feel like I have to go to the doctors soon because I need to know if I'm delusional or if there's actually something wrong with me and grandma keeps saying she'll take me but never does and it's getting really bad
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And at this point sometimes I feel like I'm gonna have to get really sick to force her to take me
I won't do it but my desperation is definitely coming out -
I'm just glad I'm home because I couldn't take my parents any longer at that point
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The constant "we're so alike" with my dad and the walking on eggshells with mom so she doesn't have a freak out was too much with my period in the equation
I almost did snap at them but I didn't -
So noon was perfect to leave, because I just faked sleeping until there was little time for me to be around mom and dad
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But I have to do pancakes in therapy and I'm gonna freak out I know it
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But now I have to re adjust to acting like how I do here for the past couple of days but I think those two good days were a fluke or something
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So I'm probably just gonna end up back to self isolating
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And then I'm gonna have to go back to my more "crazy" persona
Which is kinda fun when I get into it, but getting back into the strong personality is going to be hard -
I wish I was like in a book or a tv series or movie or something so I could go on youtube and watch a character analysis of myself
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I guess all these negative emotions are perfect an hour before therapy
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I wish I wasn't self aware
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Why do these bits of happiness have to happen right before my period? I hate watching all of those good feelings get literally shattered to pieces in front of my very eyes as a reminder that I'll always end up right back here where I started
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