Untitled Romance Roleplay
Thread Topic: Untitled Romance Roleplay
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You're ashamed of yourself for being with me. You might as well just be ashamed of me. Jayden wondered if he felt uncomfortable kissing him, too. He sighed. "I need some fresh air." He mumbled, standing up.
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Chester’s face fell. He hated himself for messing up. ‘O-Okay,’ he mumbled, sitting back down on the bed and crossing his legs. He didn’t know what to say to make it better. He looked up at him. ‘I love you.’
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Jayden looked at him, very sad and very upset. He almost said he loved Chester too, and he felt like crap for not saying it, but he worried it'd sound like he forgave Chester if he did. Like oh, I still love you though, so it's fine. Keep being ashamed of me.
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Chester’s face fell at the look on his face. He wanted him to stay. He wanted him to kiss his head and tell him it was normal to feel this way and that Jayden also felt that way when he realised he liked men. When Jayden didn’t say anything, he looked down, fidgeting with his pocket watch. He half expected Jayden to want to break up with him now. ‘I’m sorry.’
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Jayden wanted to stay with him, to try and help him stop being upset about it, and try to decipher how to prevent this from happening, but he knew that if he did, he'd end up just getting more upset by not leaving and clearing his mind when he could. "I-I'm sorry too." He said before leaving.
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Chester watched the door shut. He grabbed the bag and looked at the dresses inside. He hung them up carefully in the closet and sat down on the floor in the corner, tucking himself in the small crook between the bookshelf and the wall, and morphing into a mouse.
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Jayden refused to start crying. He'd broken down by Chester's door too many times at this point, and it always ended with Chester realizing he was next to his door crying. Instead he walked to the garden.
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Chester climbed up onto the windowsill, his tiny mouse form curling up by the open window. He looked down at his garden, down at the rainbow flowerbed he and Jayden had created. He hoped it wouldn’t end up like Beatrice’s. He hoped that once it eventually died, he and Jayden would be older and married and they’d replant flowers together. But he’d messed up again, and now Jayden thought he was ashamed of their love, and now, that future he wanted so bad didn’t seem possible. He turned away from his garden.
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Jayden sat down next to the rainbow flowerbed, laying down close enough to it that his hair flopped down onto some of the flowers. He pulled a petal off of a violet one gently.
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(I’m feeling depressed today don’t mind me lmfao)
Chester scuttled along the windowsill and settled back in his little nook, closing his eyes. He figured he’d sleep the bad thoughts away and wait till Jayden hopefully forgave him. -
(alg man I'm just depressed in the i-really-want-to-stare-at-a-blank-wall-for-the-rest-of-eternity way atm xD)
Jayden curled up, staring at one of the flowers as it it were the reason Chester was embarrassed by being with him. He knew it wasn't fair to Chester, leaving him alone with all of that to unpack. He also knew it wasn't fair to him, feeling like he was being a bad partner over it when he needed time to breathe. -
(Fair enough lol, I’m depressed in the way I want to shove it onto my characters instead of addressing it but like maybe don’t stare at a wall for all eternity there are much more interesting things than walls)
Chester struggled to sleep. He felt thrown away, but it was his own fault. He didn’t know how to explain this feeling. He hated himself for loving a man like he loved Jayden, but at the same time he was proud Jayden had chosen him, and he wanted to be with him forever. The confliction exhausted his little mouse brain, and he soon fell asleep in his little nook. -
(Faiiiiiir lmao- idc man I have no motivation to do anything-
Also how did the conflict make Chester fall asleep- it's giving perfect sleep schedule D:<)
After a bit more of going around in circles on whether or not he should forgive him, Jayden stood up and walked to Chester's room. -
(I feel you man, don’t burn yourself out. Get your rest my dude
Shhh he’s been through too much xD let him sleep)
Chester was curled up in his nook as a little mouse, sleeping. -
(Lmao ok. i WiLL.... just later)
Jayden looked around for him once he was in Chester's room. "Chester?"
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