alexithymia
Thread Topic: alexithymia
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I feel so guilty for wanting to just break down but I feel so horrible about myself and the world
It was just getting a little better and then that happened and everything just went to s--- -
I can’t be happy there’s just nothing to be happy about I physically cannot feel it
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im so tired lately and i'm getting like 8 hours of sleep most nights, sometimes 9
im so glad holidays are in a couple of weeks (its friday today so week 8 is almost over) if it was only halfway through the term i'd be screwed fr fr -
god forbid she stand less than a metre away from me
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my uncle renovated my grandmother’s house a few weeks ago
She died in 2022 but it took us a while to finalise the ownership of the house and money etc because one of my uncles is an a--hole (family drama goes hard fr fr)
But anyway my good uncle renovated the house (he’s the same one who’s jumped over the fence every time he comes to my house lmao) because it reminded him of grandma/his mum or something but I wish he’d kept it how it was
Last Christmas we spent the day at my step-grandfather’s new house which was nice but we’re spending it at grandma’s house this year which is probably gonna make us all sad because it will look so different
I have an emotion attachment to the Santa figure with the dangly legs that hung off the counter that my grandma used to bring out mid-november -
Why is talking to people so exhausting can I just be the wizard hermit who lives in a secluded forest with little birds to keep me company now
Srsly tho why are people just people it’s so tiring just being around people like piss off -
ive wasted a lot of posts on this but like-
ending a long friendship over trump
and i know im not in the wrong because ive talked to quite a few people about it and they've all said im not in the wrong
its just like why would you throw this away over a perv carrot man. like why.
its just the stupidity of it like i genuinely dont care what someone believes but if you love this guy so much to the point you're ending a friendship (because I was venting about how much i hate him? while I was spiralling?) because of him then idek man
like i was spiralling because of the fate of the world etc and she just argued with me idk if i want to be bffs with someone like that but i at least want to understand why you did that then ghosted me (and "because my parents like trump" isnt a good reason like you'd rather throw away our friendship because of something someone told you they believe (and didn't even tell you to believe)?) -
and i cant read minds if you dont want to talk about it over text and do it irl then f---ing tell me instead of ghosting me
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yeah, no, that's a really crappy way for a friendship to end-
it's one hundred percent not your fault, you're entitled to your own opinions, and just bc yours don't line up with theirs, does not mean they should have treated you like that and cut you out of their life. -
That's so stupid
It's also just the fact that it was just straight up arguing that bugs me too- like it's possible to have a friendly debate (*cough* that's why debate teams are so fun lol) but if they were really this willing to throw away a friendship over this debate, why didn't they mention that?? like it's so easy to just go "I don't feel comfortable talking about this" or "I don't want to argue so lets just stop" like cmon man -
she just got mad at me, ghosted me, then pretended i didnt exist for a week- im pretty sure i was keeping it friendly too its just ughhh
she didnt even tell me what i did wrong i'd prefer that so i'd know her boundaries but i cant read minds -
idk maybe i am in the wrong but she didnt tell me how i was just got mad at me for something
i need closure for these things idk if she's left hints for me to take but just give me a straight answer i hate being ghosted -
anyway whats done is done we're not friends anymore
i wish it had turned out different i just didnt know who else to go to when i was spiraling about the us politics and it just ended up like that -
and if you're not comfortable with talking about something then dont bring it up
like if you say im wrong im going to ask why you think im wrong and if you just plainly deny that trump isn't racist with no proof when i have proof idk what to say -
like 1 get your own sources and fact-check and 2 dont believe everything your parents tell you
idc if your dad says hes not a grapist like your dad is wrong- i feel sorry for the dozens women who came forward about seggsual misconduct (since the f---ing 1970s) and how many men are just going "nah thats not real"
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