"can't the future just wait?"
Thread Topic: "can't the future just wait?"
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mom's on my ass abt my grades. wish i could just actually pay attention and do my damn work, but i keep getting distracted. i'm distracted rn. f--- me...
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i'm so sick of being expected to have certain grades, like- i have a learning disability! of f---ing course my grades aren't always gonna be perfect! ever thought abt that, ma?? god i'm just so sick of it.
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i srsly don't think my teachers realize that, including their class, i have like 4 others that i have worksheets, quizzes, tests and assignments for? and they're all always due on the exact same day?? i like having different due dates for my work so i kind of have an idea to know 'okay, these few days are when i'll do my homework for these few classes before, and these few days i'll so my homework for these classes before the due date'
but no- ofc not :')
plus i'm just a major procrastinator, so- fk my life T^T -
i'm just- so sick of school. it makes me upset, literally 'depressed' in a sense, yk? it RUINS your mental health in far more ways than one. when you get less than average grades, it makes you feel bad abt yourself for not getting a slightly higher grade. and the ranking of students? god, it's so degrading, especially to people's self esteem. like, you don't have to be good at math if you want a job that doesn't require it! same with science, history and english! there are obviously things in the classes you can benefit from, but like- a f--- ton of the stuff we're actually being taught isn't worth ANYTHING! i s--- you not, half of the experiments i do in chemistry i will never touch on again, most of the equations i have to solve in math will not be something i remember how to solve in a year or two bc we all have phones and calculators to do it for us? and i'm literally not gonna remember vocab words for literally anything. god i'm just so sick of school.
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i need a hug, i think.
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i may be over exaggerating abt the school work predicament? i mean, at least a bit. there's still stress but at least is doesn't look like much? also all the stupid quizzes i have in class don't actually count for my grade, which is good bc my grades for some of them kinda suck ngl. a few of them i had forgotten to answer the worksheets for but the other ones i did actually study for so i- i can't tell you why i got bad grades on them :')
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god, i miss his face :'(
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i feel like my new adhd meds are making me, essentially, "lose my ~sparkle~" iykwim xD
i just, idk i feel like i'm not like me normally? idk how to describe it, but whatever. -
i think my meds do mess with my brain a bit-
idk, i just feel kinda weird when i take it?
but then again, i kind of have to take it, bc it's supposed to stop the forgetful-ness and getting distracted n such -
i also just honestly feel like s---.
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god i'm so nervous i did smth wrong-
god, i srsly hope i didn't say anything wrong T^T -
i feel like s--- again, unsurprisingly enough.
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You okay? What happened, if you don’t mind me asking?
I’m here to chat if you need :) -
ahh, late reply, sorry ^^'
nothing really, just my mother silently judging me for the things i eat, when i'm supposed to be on a diet.
i try, i really do, but it's hard... then i'm also concerned abt smth else, but that can wait lol -
i don't like school. makes me wanna slam my head against a wall.
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