My Page :D
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:22pm
Thread Topic: My Page :D
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Dear ______,
Hi.. I hope you're okay. Haven't heard from you in a while. I'm starting to worry. I want to know if you're okay. I need to know. I just can't help but feel like I annoy you. If you wanted to talk to me then you would, right? Things have changed so much since last year. Things I never wanted to change. Things I would give up anything for. I wish we at least talked. That we talked how we used to. You ease off the pain I feel. You ease off this insanity, this madness, this thing I have become. I always told myself I would not become a monster but I guess I failed that too. A monster is everything I am. A person unworthy of anything. I don't deserve everything I have. I don't deserve to know an angel like you. I don't deserve it. At night, I think. I think of everything. How life would be without this or how it would be with that. How it would be if I went right instead of left. Should I go left where there's nothing right. Or right where theres nothing left? Heh.. I miss you so much. It's hard to describe. You know what's worse than that feeling? To know you don't miss me. I'm sorry it has to end this way. I'm sorry it had to end that way. It feels like something is squishing my heart slowly and painfully. I can feel the exact moments when it gets stabbed and beaten. Beaten.. Up to the point it doesn't feel anything for a couple of hours. Just beaten. Night. You're my enemy. Day. You're not much better. You used to tell me to stop cutting. At times it feels like you're holding the blade. You're so far, so out of reach yet so close all I have to do is extend my hand and you'll be there. Understand me? No? Me either. I think I've said this before but I'm failing this life. This opportunity. This.. This chance of happiness. I'm completely failing it. I had a dream of my grandpas death.. :/ I miss him. He died a couple of years back. But in my dreams he had recently died. I didn't see him alive though.. I saw him in his coffin.. I miss him so much. I want to dream about you. That way I'll have you close, I'll have you close enough to hug to talk to. Yet every time I dream about you your so distant kind of in like this 'life'. I'm losing hope so much. I want it all to stop. I want it all to be how it used to be. I want to be happy. I want you to be happy. Meh..... I'm sorry. For everything. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.. I'm working on a poem.. "you were the wicked devil disguised as him to make me draw on myself pretty pictures of us. Yet the pictures never came out good enough. Maybe because I always drew on my wrist. Or maybe because the utensil was a blade. Or was it because the color was blood red?" hah. I'm tired of everything. I'm tired of feeling this worthless of feeling this sadness of just feeling something. I'm going to bed. Goodnight. I hope you're sleeping.. You deserve so much things I wish I could give you. The most important thing is happiness.. Heh. Night.
Sincerely,
Me. -
.w. Hai.
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Hi.
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Uhh want a hug or something? I don't know. That was..Yeah..
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e-e I ish watching Zenon.
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Sorry, I just had to let it out.. And no I'm good..
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@Anime what that?
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*What's ._.
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No need to apologize bud..
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A Original Disney movie that takes place in Space.
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@Alex :/ I hate night time.
@Anime That sounds like fun. I like Disney movies. -
@Homie, Ikr. and I love Cadet Kelly and Wendy Woo. I hate the Disney's modern movies. Also Lizy miguire.
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Disney used to be cool now.. It sucks. As well for other kid channels.
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You should just sleep instead of stay up.
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