New thread, new me.
- Locked due to inactivity on Jun 23, '20 3:54am
Thread Topic: New thread, new me.
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Hi!
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Idk I'm kinda lost
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Like idk what to do with myself
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Everything's so different
The plan was to finish high school like everyone else
But now I'm wondering if that's even possible? Considering how things have been -
My life is so different from what I thought it would be at this point in time
I wanted a job
I wanted a license [well, not really but also kinda]
I wanted good grades
Maybe look at colleges?
But I've just been home
Doing nothing
Waiting for them to set a date for the meeting they said we were going to have in December
I'm going to have to stay back, aren't I?
Or are they going to kick me out by then?
Everything is kinda crumbling
I'm just kinda existing -
Will this be how life is for me?
They won't do what everyone has been asking them to do
Now my grandma is going to try to get DMH involved -
I want to do something
But what is there to do?
My grandma isn't going to randomly take me shopping with my gift cards
That would be a waste of gas, wouldn't it?
I want to ask
Does she even have the time? -
We're going to try to plan something
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I need to stop looking at her account
It's over
It only makes it hurt more -
Greetings!
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Howdy
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What're you doing?
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Sorry family stuff was going on
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More edgy ventos don't worry I'm alright sometimes I just get a little bleh at night
-i think I'm a tad bit of a perfectionist and it makes it hard for me to get hobbies because I get so frustrated with myself I'm on the verge of breaking something or crying like I wanted to try digital art but then after/if not even a week later I was so angry at myself bc I kept f---ing up that I stopped it all together
-I get really insecure and frustrated and upset at myself bc I determine everything about myself based on how others seem to think of me and I think it's becoming more of an obsession bc I spend the majority of my time thinking about what other people think of me and sometimes I just get so grossed out I want to vomit. I also have a fear of people leaving me and if I see that a friend is online and didn't reply to my response/text after like two minutes I can't stop thinking about it and it stays in my head until they respond and its just duwbr jo soerhw un wbeg -
I should get all of my gift cards and see how much I have
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