Manipulative people
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:22pm
Thread Topic: Manipulative people
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Blue Frost NewbieThere are some people like this on gtq and people should be careful about who they trust !
A manipulator's aggression is not obvious. Our gut may tell us that they're fighting for something, struggling to overcome us, gain power, or have their way, and we find ourselves unconsciously on the defensive. But because we can't point to clear, objective evidence they're aggressive against us, we can't easily validate our feelings.
The tactics manipulators use can make it seem like they're hurting, caring, defending, ..., almost anything but fighting. These tactics are hard to recognize as merely clever ploys. They always make just enough sense to make a person doubt their gut hunch that they're being taken advantage of or abused. Besides, the tactics not only make it hard for you to consciously and objectively tell that a manipulator is fighting, but they also simultaneously keep you or consciously on the defensive. These features make them highly effective psychological weapons to which anyone can be vulnerable. It's hard to think clearly when someone has you emotionally on the run.
All of us have weaknesses and insecurities that a clever manipulator might exploit. Sometimes, we're aware of these weaknesses and how someone might use them to take advantage of us. For example, I hear parents say things like: "Yeah, I know I have a big guilt button." But at the time their manipulative child is busily pushing that button, they can easily forget what's really going on. Besides, sometimes we're unaware of our biggest vulnerabilities. Manipulators often know us better than we know ourselves. They know what buttons to push, when and how hard. Our lack of self-knowledge sets us up to be exploited.
What our gut tells us a manipulator is like, challenges everything we've been taught to believe about human nature. We've been inundated with a psychology that has us seeing everybody, at least to some degree, as afraid, insecure or "hung-up." So, while our gut tells us we're dealing with a ruthless conniver, our head tells us they must be really frightened or wounded "underneath." What's more, most of us generally hate to think of ourselves as callous and insensitive people. We hesitate to make harsh or seemingly negative judgements about others. We want to give them the benefit of the doubt and assume they don't really harbour the malevolent intentions we suspect. We're more apt to doubt and blame ourselves for daring to believe what our gut tells us about our manipulator's character.
Guilt-tripping Manipulators are often skilled at using what they know to be the greater conscientiousness of their victims as a means of keeping them in a self-doubting, anxious, and submissive position. The more conscientious the potential victim, the more effective guilt is as a weapon. Aggressive personalities of all types use guilt-tripping so frequently and effectively as a manipulative tactic, that I believe it illustrates how different in character they are compared to other personalities. All a manipulator has to do is suggest to the conscientious person that they don't care enough, are too selfish, etc., and that person immediately starts to feel bad. On the contrary, a conscientious person might try until they're blue in the face to get a manipulator (or any other aggressive personality) to feel badly about a hurtful behaviour, acknowledge responsibility, or admit wrongdoing, to absolutely no avail. -
I never seen you before frost
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Blue Frost NewbieHi dragon . I have been reading the forum for a few months but didn't really have the courage to post anything . I have been quite shocked how some people on here play games with others heads and hearts , it's sad - so I found this stuff on being manipulated and hope people read it , it might help someone who is being used by others .
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Dude. If this is about passwords and internet safety and whatnot, I'm just going to tell you what I've told all my teachers about this.
Just because I befriend somebody on the internet, doesn't mean I'm going to tell them everything. -
Blue Frost NewbieSage , if you actually read the post you will see that it has nothing to do with passwords and internet safety . It has to do with people lying to others in order to get them to like them or to pay them attention . It is about making people feel guilty or unsure about themselves so you can feel good about yourself.
An example of manipulating someone would be say 2 people are dating and the girl breaks up with the guy and then the guy starts telling her he's going to cut himself or kill himself or run away if she leaves him! That's manipulation and it's disgusting to do that to somebody. The girl is made to feel guilty about ending a relationship and feels responsible for the guy harming himself.
There are people on this site that are doing this and its WRONG !
Most the users on this forum are pretty young and they are not mature enough to see when they are being used in this kind of way. With a result they become depressed and guilty , feel trapped in a relationship they don't want to be in and sometimes end up harming themselves.
People need to be aware of others who behave in this way . -
Okay Mr.Noob. Here's what you need to do. Listen closely,or you wont be able to handle it.
Cry a river, build a bridge, and GET. OVER. IT. -
I don't have time for reading long posts but I've read your third post and actually I think your totally right =3 I completely agree.
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To be honest Zane,I think he/she is not a noob.Anyone who is a "Drama Queen" is a noob.
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I have a sister who is manipulative trying to get me to obey her or she tries to hurt me. I have a few friends like that but its kinda weird. I can tell if someone is manipulative or not but on here it never works.
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I was taken for a ride last night, HA!
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Blue Frost NewbieHi all , I am a ms not a mr. Zane, you need to listen closely. I think your game is up mate. You have been playing with innocent girls and your lies have been found out. I would recommend you start telling the truth ,especially to the girls you claim to be in love with. I am going to give you a chance here and if you don't come clean especially to Firesoul , I am going to expose all your BS on this forum.
Start with the nonsense about the airplane tickets you tore up .....
I am sure you are a very nice person and have a lot of good qualities but playing emotional games with people is really not cool , especially those who live miles away on other continents ! -
Frost, we may not like people causing drama. But we have been able to cope with them and deal with them.
You are making emotional threats and acting superior whilst this is only your second day. I don't care how long you've been stalking. If you didn't have the balls to post and get to know the people personally, your opinion is invalid anyways.
I do not appreciate the way you're threatening our users, and even if I don't agree with them, I will defend them against such egotistic, pompous, behaviour.
Welcome to GTQ. Grow up or get out. -
Blue Frost NewbieI am grown up barberbob , I am one of the users parents . I will refrain from posting here as I do have the perpetrators email and will take it up with him personally.
You may not tolerate "egotistic, pompous, behaviour" but I am not going to sit back and tolerate emotional and mental abuse of my child perpetuated by one of the forum members. -
So an adult is threatening and putting down little children. Congratulations.
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Oh, you're a parent? Makes sense now.
Your kid's not gonna learn anything if you solve all their problems, Mom. This is probably a better place for Junior to learn how to solve their own problems. Let the kid grow up, stop acting like a mother bear.
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