Shrouded despair and forgotten ambitions
Thread Topic: Shrouded despair and forgotten ambitions
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I f---ing hate myself
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Baby Hotline is more true than I’d like it to be right now
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You're not stupid, and no hating yourself, because you're one of the coolest people I know. I hate that you get in trouble for speaking up, like wtf?
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IK, it’s f---ed up. I just wish I was enough for her, but yk.
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I’m gonna get real political here just beware
I find it so frustrating when ppl are transphobic and they look at young ppl and be like ‘you’re too young to know your gender identity’. And their entire reasoning behind that is that it could be a phase and I’ll want to detransition and I’ll regret transitioning and s---. Like this hasn’t happened to me today, a video just popped up into my fyp about people who have detransitioned. Nobody is promoting hormones that change your body to people under 16-18. Like no trans person is saying ‘yeah let the 12 year old gender dysphorics stop having puberty’. If you’ve detransitioned, cool, but literally that’s not a reason for ppl to be all ‘you have no idea what your gender identity is bc you’re young and you’ll probably detransition’.
And barely any trans ppl have detransitioned. Like that’s under 5%, probably less. It’s ridiculous cause that’s how transphobic ppl will justify their transphobia it’s honestly ridiculous. Like there’s a difference between gender affirming care (binders, letting ppl wear what they want) and going on medication to be who you want (like testosterone and s---)
And the scary thing is is that when I go to some of my friend’s houses I’ll have to pretend to be a guy (bc most girls my age wouldn’t have such short “boyish” hair) bc some of their parents are transphobic. Like I shouldn’t have to do that, ppl should just let me be non binary in peace-
And the thing is these are mainly the dads, too. I don’t expect my friend’s parents to use my pronouns, but I shouldn’t be nervous about meeting them bc some of them are transphobic. -
Anyways um big rant but that was mainly abt detransitioning stuffs and ppl using that as their main argument against trans ppls
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When you can’t tell if you’re being flirted with or if she’s just rlly nice 😭
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So nobody cares about me now
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I care about you
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i also care about you :D <333
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Thanks guys
Another therapy appointment, another hour being told what I’m doing wrong -
I feel... unimportant. Nobody can read minds, but when i cry I get yelled at... When she cries my mother spends over 20 minutes trying to comfort her... Maybe I just don't have valid reasons to be upset, because I haven't cried over "typical teenage problems" (e.g. anything that doesn't relate to suicidal thoughts bc yay) like adults expect me to ig? Like I get crushes and friendship drama as much as the next person obviously, but I was alone for years and nobody knew. To my parents I'm a moody teenager, and yh I am, but like, I have bad thoughts. And I get that physical health comes before mental health, but still... I don't like being yelled at for having mental problems
And I've never really felt supported the same way she has, but then again I can't read minds either.. Like it could just be youngest child being the favourite, and i get that her problems are just as valid as mine bc they are, but sometimes I feel like mine are.. less valid, if that makes sense -
but idk man its nearly 10.30, and i'm not allowed in my room bc she's comforting her for a reason nobody's told me about, so it could just be the tiredness talking
like, they care about having good vibes for her, but that doesn't mean I can't feel negative feelings? or does it? idek anymore -
The double standards…
‘Human beings feel emotions when they feel them’ my mother says, right after she tells me to pull myself together -
I feel like a bad big sibling but yk…
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