when did y'all just kinda... obtain sentience?
- Locked due to inactivity on Apr 12, '23 3:54am
Thread Topic: when did y'all just kinda... obtain sentience?
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Oh, neat ig
I always thought my first memory was kinda mundane but man -
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It's really weird for me. Like, the older I get, the less I remember memories from a younger age. The only thing I can remember past the age of six was when I was three years old, and my parents were arguing. Apparently, that argument was about the divorce. Then I ask my dad, as I'm in his car, going to his apartment. "Why aren't you living with mommy anymore?"
"Because me and mommy had a fight and she kicked me out." -
When they were arguing in the hallway, I was covering my ears, saying "STOP IT, STOP IT. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT. IF YOU'RE GONNA FIGHT, DO IT IN THE BEDROOM WITH THE DOOR CLOSED." I was crying, hard. And that's how I have an intense fear of conflict caused by my PTSD.
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I'm so sorry Mt, that sounds incredibly stressful and you didn't deserve to go through that :(
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It wasn't my fault. Plus, I'm actually glad they divorced. I can escape from the madness when I'm with my father. Ironic, because I live with my mother and stepfather more. And funny you mention stress, because, even though I'm a minor, I already have some natural clumps of white hairs!
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I'm fine physically, but emotionally and mentally, I'm screwed up. Since my mother has remarried, I got to witness fights. They've thrown stuff at each other and did so over small things that could have been discussed without raising their voices. They wouldn't hurt me, at least not yet. I'm just waiting for another divorce to happen and I don't think my stepfather knew what he was getting into when he married my mom.
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But enough about me and my trauma. Continue on with the thread of what this whole topic is about.
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oh... I'm sorry...
I don't know what else to say... -
My earliest memory I have is my first birthday party I had it at a rental hall by my house and it was with family along with some of my parents friends. It was themed as grover from sesame street and my smash cake was grover too. Don't ask me why I remember that so well lol.
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wack lmao
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Yeah I can remember the most random and oldest things in my life time quite well lol. Another odd thing I remember like it was yesterday is my show and tell poster I created in kindergarten as a child lol.
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No I just realized I have a memory earlier than the one I mentioned before.
I remember my dad reassembling my old crib when I was two. I asked him why and he said something along the lines of, "Remember? You're getting a baby sister." And then he messed up putting it together so he had to take it apart a bit and then put it together again.
Another funny thing is that in this memory I remember remembering when my dad took it down when I was too old for the crib. But I don't remember it now. -
the earliest memory I have was having surgery when I was awake
I was only around two at the time so my parents had to hold me down
I wasn't extremely sentient then, but being the earliest memory, that's it lmao
I'd say when I actually became sentient was one night when I was 4 or 5 (late sentiency LMAO) and I couldn't sleep, so I went to my mother's room and just sat there by her
she awoke, and we had a short conversation, but I stayed up all night
it was the first time I've reflected on something and actually got the chance to think. life was always so busy, I was always doing something that I never even realized I had the ability to think
ever since then, time went fast, and sometimes I would even question if that time was yesterday or years ago -
another early memory (probs my second earliest memory) was when I was two or three
my mother's grandmother had just died, and them being close, she had been sobbing for days on end, spacing off and crying into a photo of her standing in the parking lot
I vividly remember my disability to comfort her, and I felt absolutely awful
she was standing by a window, the photo of her grandmother standing in a parking lot with two cars behind her propped up on a window sill, and she was staring out the window
me still being a bean, I took one glance at the cars behind her (one being a semi truck), and asked,
"did she get hit by that car?"
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