The Amelia Concours
Thread Topic: The Amelia Concours
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if i just act like i used to, like the things i used to, play the games, listen to the music, wear the clothes, everything like i did back then, can I make it real enough in my head? What if I condition myself to thinking mentally "I still have you?"
I don't even have to think those words. i'll just have the feeling that youre there with me because everything i'm experiencing is like it was back then, its like pseudo-pretending.
i dont even think it matters if i live a lie like that, what harm would it even do me? its not like I have a chance with anyone else anyways, especially after fumbling those other girls. i only thought about you when i was with them anyways.
It might give me some mental comfort, even if its fake, i just dont have to tell myself that -
you just haunt me so badly, and i can't handle it, because i cant get better but i also know i cant succumb to it. so where's the middle ground? do i just accept middle ground? youre like chains on me, and pulling me down, and covering my eyes, and i cant move. and im reaching up for someone to help me but apparently im calling out wrong.
im completely bound. i just wish YOU had been different, no matter what you had been through in the past. i probably would have forgot about you by now.
Not that any of this changes all the relapsing on the past ive been doing. i cant tell if its just you thats killing me, or if its the both of us. -
and since youre my type, what do i do? The only people i ever seem to take interest in either look like you, act like you, or are somehow like you, and its not just anybody, its still very few people.
do i just accept the way it is and chase after these people, and be constantly reminded of you? even still, none of these people live up to the bar you set anyways. the video games, how easy it was to talk to you, the whole nine yards.
if i found the ideal woman who likes all the stuff i do, itd wind up being just like it was you. i dont know if its coincidence or not. it doesnt matter.
what other girls like souls games and elder scrolls? and act the way you did? and like the music you did, even if i didnt like it? and smile at me like you did? they dont exist. especially not here. youre the only one. so im lost, and i dont know what to do. -
I remember the beginning of this summer, playing ds1 in the evening, eating lays cheddar poppables, drinking white peach liquid iv, in this nonstop thunderstorm and i didnt have a care on earth. i probably went for a whole day without thinking about you. it was so nice
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i just want to pull open my skin and let it all drain out until i can see and focus again
i dont want any organs, or memories, i just want to see and learn and focus, and nothing else -
i wish we could play video games together
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anything
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is it getting a 60 fps patch or no? im not buying a whole new game for it, it doesnt need remastered, the graphics are already fine. it just needs a patch. same with dark souls 3 if these rumors are true, i mean really of all things that could be in the works. Also clueless to why they haven't announced a new game yet, its almost time for the 3 year cycle again
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i need help
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im so exhausted
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ultraviolent
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i know who you are and im looking at you right now.
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and if
you
call
for me
ill run
run
run
(away) -
skip
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