The wounds that never show...
Thread Topic: The wounds that never show...
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Things I can't explain that bother me:
1. I borderline hate my mom. I guess we've never really gotten along.
2. I don't like company. Even just the family I live with makes me have anxiety attacks when they try to squeeze into my world.
3. I can't view life with a realistic sense. I can never get by the day without imagining I'm somewhere else doing something else.
4. I love to collect useless info about things I really like, but no one else is interested.
5. I don't like people looking at me.
6. I'd rather see things, not people.
7. I'm not interested in anything anyone else is.
8. I often abandon a place or hobby if someone else tries to join me.
9. I don't like to speak. I really started speaking when I was 8.
10. My body is finicky about everything I eat and when I eat. -
So much drama here today.
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Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad
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I miss my handful of friends. I haven't talked to them in ages. My mom has their number, but I hate having to use her phone. She's always reading through my texts and listening to my conversations. After that last really bad fight we had, I vowed to myself to never use her phone again.
I deserve privacy!
I don't have a phone, though, so I can't talk to them. I have no way of contact. -
I know what it might sound like, but I assure you, I am not a witch and I did not curse you.
A little while ago, before this year, I knew somebody. Before they were mean to me, I told them "As you have done to me, so it shall be done to you."
They took these words lightly, shrugging it off like a joke. Did I laugh? No.
Now, a year later, they are seeing the effects of what I said. It wasn't a prediction, it was purely a fact that it would...and it has... -
I cry too much. But, I'm always sad. Crying is the only way to express my sadness when no one else cares. I say all my sad things here so I don't fill my journal with sad things. One day, I hope to lock this thread because I final feel better and stay better.
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Almost lunch time. At least I won't be sad and hungry, then. Just sad.
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I don't have anyone to talk to irl. I just pretend that it's not real. I pretend it's not happening and hopefully it'll go away. Addressing the problems doesn't work, so the only thing I can do is ignore it.
Sad that it's like that. I wish I wasn't. Hurts to believe that I was only born to feel this. I guess it's a requirement for infinitely-sad people to exist, for whatever reason. -
I just really want a cat black cat. I'd name him Kaiba. I'd talk to Kaiba about everything. He'd listen, I'm sure, and then I could cuddle him when I'm sad.
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Virtual pets make me miserable because it's like, "Look at you with your screen-cat! Ha! That's so pathetic."
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I wish I had gotten to do all the things normal kids do. I never got to experience my life the way I'd hoped. I don't even know how to ride a bike. I've never been to a sleepover, and now it's nice to know that in a few years, a huge part of my life would've passed as unmemorable time.
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I don't really like anything in life, honestly. I guess I just live because I don't get a choice. Parents never consider the chance that the child might not want to be born. But, we can't blame them. Kids don't know they don't want to exist until they exist.
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I think we can all agree and say that everything is fairly awful in life. It's just a matter of whether we believe so or not. Nothing is truly great. Nothing amuses me. Nothing could ever last.
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Hey, I just wanted you to know I'm here for you. I know we haven't talked, but I am always available for a chat.
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What do I even look forward to? What, I just live and hope that tomorrow will be better?! No, I just live and endure the pain of life, but the biggest pain is life itself.
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