Killing Pain [1 x 1]
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:32pm
Thread Topic: Killing Pain [1 x 1]
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"I'm not addicted to anything, Noel, I'm not a hobo crack addict. I just have headaches." He followed the look down at the plate, feeling his face flush, especially since he hadn't even noticed his own mistake before then. "We're out of bread," he said, in a small voice, praying that they actually were.
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"Baby, if those headaches are bad enough that your taking three times the pills you should be, we need to go to the doctor." Noel finally took the bow tie off, unbuttoning the collar button. "We shouldn't be. I bought a loaf yesterday, because didn't have toast for breakfast. Oh, God, Ben, you have a problem. What if you take too much- You're already taking too much, but- What if you take too much, and it kills you? Or messes your insides up? Baby, please."
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He shook his head, leaning back in his seat. His eyes closed, but he kept talking. "Love, stop worrying, please," he said, brushing off the hot dog bun incident like it hadn't happened. "I win't take that much, and I don't have a problem. If I want to stop taking the pills then I can."
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(Desu means 'is, are, am, be'.)
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"Then stop taking them, Ben, please. I can't stop worrying, baby, I can't. I don't know what I would do if something happened to you. I don't know if I could handle it. Okay? Please, if you want to prove to me, stop taking them. I.. I'm not hungry. I'm gonna go take a shower." Without another word, he stood up, leaving into the bedroom that connected to the only bathroom with a shower. It was a small apartment, but it worked for them.
Noel had been slipping too, lately. But, he dealt with it in different ways. Ways that no one could notice. Scorching hot showers, smoking, and yelling. The yelling was probably the worse. He yelled a lot. Mostly at Ben, though he didn't mean to, and always felt like s--- about it. -
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woops
Ben was pretty done at that point, fed up with being interrogated. Of course, say that he could stop whenever he wanted was a total lie. He had no idea what he'd do without the medication, because even when he couldn't get more for a day or so, that whole day would be a terrible one, where he'd be irritable, have a terrible headache, and in general feel terrible.
When Noel had left, he groaned in a little annoyance, but other than that, he brushed off the confrontation. His tongue was starting to go numb, and he sighed in content as his brain relaxed- the high, that's what he always aimed for. -
He stepped into the shower after undressed, tilting his head back, enjoying the burning heat pouring over his skin. Maybe later he's go smoke a bit. He knew it was bad for him, he had weak lungs as it was, but if was better than upsetting Ben.
After he finished his shower, he dressed in pajamas- Baggy sweat pants, a plain white shirt, and black slippers. He grabbed a box of cigarettes, heading towards the door. -
Benedict had moved to the couch by the time the shower stopped, laying on his back. His hands were on his stomach, and his eyes were closed, and he was almost half-asleep. The feeling was somewhat like he wasn't even in his body, like he was some third-person entity. But whenever he blinked his eyes open, there he was, looking up at the ceiling.
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He paused, though, sighing and setting the carton down in favor of going to hover over Ben, who's eyes were closed. Make up sex, maybe? It had been a while. They had been taking turns pushing each other away, lately, but Noel just wanted to touch him right now, make him feel better to where he didn't need the drugs. This in mind, he moved over him, leaning down to kiss him.
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Benedict hadn't heard Noel enter, only knew he was there when he felt a pressure against his lips. He reached forward, eyes fluttering open, to gently push Noel away. "Nah righ' now," he slurred.
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Noel whined, but stopped, gently laying on him, careful not too put too much weight on them. "Ben, we never.. Oh, you know what? Can we pull out the bed on the couch and watch a movie? And cuddle, and eat popcorn? Like we used to?"
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Ben sighed a little, not in the best shape to move around to much. But, he still wanted to please his boyfriend, so he nodded. "Mmhm," he hummed, putting an arm around him.
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"I love you, you know, silly," He muttered, kissing his forehead. "We don't have to. We can lay right here, and.. Talk." So as long as they were doing something together, Noel didn't care. When he had ranted to his older sister about his relationship falling apart, she had laughed and told him to pack his bags. She was wrong, he had been sure. But now, a full two months later, it wasn't any better.
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Ben was actually quite happy to hear that Noel still loved him, or at least he said he did. He'd worried that they hadn't been the same happy couple that they used to be lately, and that they might break up. Which wasn't ideal, because he loved Noel. "I love you too," he breathed, then after a second, "Talk, love?"
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