Dancing In The Rain
Thread Topic: Dancing In The Rain
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Some people don't want to die, they just want to end their old life
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Consider this
Rather than dying, you start a new life -
I wonder how people's lives would be changed if I never existed. I wonder what impact I have left and what it would be like if the fingerprints of my existence never were.
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Even if it was one person, for one moment who's life changed even just a little bit for the better because of me, my existence mattered and still does
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I have one of the most unusual and honestly somewhat horrific coping mechanisms but it works and does no one any harm, so it is good
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Although I don't think I'll be talking about it here as it's rather triggering but I promise I'm not talking about s/h to anyone who sees this
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Let me retreat into the worlds of my mind. My fields of unending green with puffy clouds, a sky of endless blue with distant mountain as a gentle breeze like a sigh makes the fabric of my dress sway. My cozy reading nook shielded from the battering storm that rages behind my window, with a nest of blankets to cradle me in my weakness and candles casting a dim light to soothe me. My forests of lushness and life where the sunlight peeks through the leaves, where small creatures chatter and sing and I can join the song of the undying heartbeat of the world, an impish being of the woods. My cafe filled with the quiet bustle of people with colours of soft beige and white, a cup of something hot next to my laptop as I type up my latest novel. My cottage at night where a fire burns in the hearth and a baby in peaceful sleep is swaddled in a cradle, a purring cat in my lap as I feed the flames another piece of wood and dwell on my plans for tomorrow.
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I love you in the purest way I can imagine. I do not tolerate your flaws, I adore them because I adore you. Just like you can't love the sugar in a cake but not the flour, I love you wholly and entirely. They make you real, they make you whole. If I could change anything about you, the only thing I'd make different is the way you see yourself.
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Why can't I just be happy, I should be happy but I just feel empty right now
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A headache like a heartbeat
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What a dull world this would be without my Tat in it
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There are many things I fear and my fear of them is what may stir them to reality, how unfortunate and ironic
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If only I had the talent to take the ideas in my head and bring forth something delightful
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Writing insane/deranged/creepy characters is so interesting because I can begin to pick apart the way they think, their mannerisms. I can understand why they think what they think and it's all terribly fascinating
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And the most interesting part is to make a character like that, to make something terrifying, take away the universal moral law from him
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