I hate feelings
- Locked due to inactivity on Jul 14, '21 3:54am
Thread Topic: I hate feelings
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Life’s kinda been annoying lately. Work? Stressful as f---. We’re incredibly short staffed. And I’m being asked and expected to pick up the slack, but I work every Monday-Thursday night, and every other weekend. My work’s schedule goes from Sunday to Saturday, so I technically work five days a week. Friday’s are my days off to catch up with school work. And that’s the thing. I’m in f---ing college right now, how the f--- am I supposed to pick up hours during the day? Like f--- off. I’m in finals next week, so I’ll definitely pick up shifts in the summer, but as far as my schedule goes, I do not want it to change whatsoever. Like at all. I want to stay on nights, and I’m gonna see if I can get more hours by coming in and working afternoons to nights. We’re short staffed because my manager is so f---ing dumb and incompetent.
I’m also constantly feeling like I can’t do anything right, like ever. So that’s always fun.
On top of that my feelings for other people are kinda stressing me because why the hell wouldn’t they?
I guess I’m complicated. One one hand we have this:
I haven’t talked to one of my friends in like over a year. It’s like she disappeared off the face of the earth or something. Flash forward to like last month, I contact her sister to see what’s going on. She’s in a complicated relationship/situation and can’t really talk. Which sucks because she’s like one of two friends I really have left from high school since I’ve graduated. She’s also someone I’ve had really strong romantic feelings for since I’ve met her. We’ve kinda played tag back and forth with our feelings, so this is kinda messing me up.
Then on the other end of the spectrum, I have feelings for a coworker. A really awesome one. I haven’t really felt this way about a girl since the one above, and she knows I like her. Which is kinda awkward but it isn’t? Like we’re both cool when we’re at work and she doesn’t seem to act weird despite knowing I’m crushing on her. Which I really want her to know how I actually, truthfully feel about her, but I can’t for a number of reasons. For one she’s in a s---ty relationship she’s supposedly trying to get out of, so I can’t really dump my feelings to her any time soon. And another thing is is that a small part of me feels like she at least feels something for me? I mean my track record for confessing my feelings for girls isn’t great. In the past, girls I’ve been friends with and developed feelings for have always ended with our friendship ending. With this coworker, we aren’t really like “ friends” but we kinda are? It’s complicated. But we always talk to each other when we can, and even though it’s really simple casual conversation, we both really seem to enjoy it. I know I do at least. Another reason I’m wondering if she feels anything back is because of her mannerisms and body language. Idk it’s weird. I’ve never dated anyone before, and I’ve never really had a girl ever really have feelings for me, so it’s kinda hard to tell. I really like her, and I like how things are between us now, but it still sucks when you have feelings for someone and you can’t tell them exactly how you feel.
And having feelings for two people at once (at least kind of two people at once, again it’s kinda complicated) sucks. -
Thanks for coming to my TEDtalk
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Been writing down how I feel. Want to share it, but really scared too.
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I know we haven't really talked, but if you need someone then I'm here 💛
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Things are getting more and more rough. I’m really not happy anymore. I feel so empty inside.
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I can emphasize with you on that. What really helps is just focusing on the little things. Sunsets, sunrises. Music, movies, people that care about you. Things can get better, even if it looks like it won't ^^
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I'm in the same situation.
The first is a guy I've been friends with since 6th grade (soon I'll be in 9th) and he's just super nice. He has a little sister and he treats her so nicely, and it's one of the reasons I fell for him. But he told me he "sees me as a sister" like... 7 months ago? And I think I'm finally getting over him. But it's weird because every time I see his face, my heart flutters a bit, but I can listen to more and more songs now w/o being reminded of him.
The second one is a girl who I met like.. a week ago. She's a confirmed wlw but she's in Louisiana now which is at least 552 miles away. She's funny, she's kind, and her head is like to my chin, which is something for me because I've always wanted a short gf. Idk why, I just do.
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