Hi Espie.
- Locked due to inactivity on Mar 21, '23 3:54am
Thread Topic: Hi Espie.
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I know you're feeling really down lately, and I'm so sorry I can't do anything to help. But I've been following your posts in your venting thread for a little bit. I'd just like to address those for now, if that's okay.
I want you to know, first and foremost, that it's natural to look back on your past behavior and feel ashamed or disgusted. It's a sign of growth. The fact that you can see that what you did back then wasn't right means you've evolved. You're doing great.
Secondly, I wanted to tell you that, while it's easy to talk s--- about little you for those things, it's far kinder to forgive her. I know that probably sounds dumb, but let me explain. You can't forgive yourself on others behalves. All you can do is recognize that you were young, and that at the time you didn't know any better. I don't know what your motives were. Maybe you wanted attention. Maybe you were genuinely on the edge and needed to express yourself. Neither of these things are inherently immoral or awful. The way you went about them hurt some people. That sucks, and it's great that you can acknowledge that and express sincere remorse, especially considering you can't take them back now. But you have to consider that you were so young. You still are. Would you look at a child of that age behaving that way and decide what they deserved to hear was the things you've said about yourself in that thread? Does that seem fair? Does that seem kind? I can't tell you what to do, but I will make a request:
Please allow yourself to forgive little you. Try to think of her as the child she was, a completely different version of you, a whole other person. What she did wasn't right, but it was what she thought she needed at the time, and that's the best that can be expected of someone so young. It's great that you regret what you did and that you want to be better. That's how it should be. But hating your younger self for it won't do you any good. She's gone now. She's just a memory of you, and hating on her can only serve to make your impression of yourself worse.
To end this post, I'd like to ask that anyone that sees this and cares about Espie post something nice about her. A memory you really enjoy or just an observation about her skills or personality traits. I just think she could use a little pick me up. -
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Awe that's really kind of you road
Espie is of my favorite peeps on here, and, as i have stated, really sweet and caring -
i genuinely don’t know what to say. this entire post and notion overall is incredibly sweet.
i see how you’re thinking, but it’s just knowing i hurt people with the actions I did. it was not acceptable. i can imagine them as an entirely different person overall, but deep down, they’re still me.
you all are so astonishingly kindhearted, and ily all. i regret what i did.
i cant forgive it yet, but i can give it time. as expressed in my recent post in my venting thread, it feels like i still have thinking and reflecting to do.
thank you for posting this once again, this really helped. i appreciate this entirely and this is super sweet of you. -
You got this dude!
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If you're not ready to forgive, that's understandable and fine. I hope you can recognize your growth and move on eventually, because you are genuinely such a lovable and valuable person.
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I'm going through the same thing dude. I'm trying to get over my self destructive tendencies so you got this
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Everyone has had their moments of being young and dumb. But we grow up, and we learn from our past mistakes. The past doesn't define you. What matters is who you are today. We all care about you, Espie! I care about you! :) We got your back, the whole way through your journey!
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thank you, i can’t express how much I appreciate this.
one thing that’s stuck in my mind is how you all kept up with my bs and you managed to forgive me in the end. you all are superhuman to do such a thing
once again, thanks so much. this really made my year. <3 -
You're so welcome. You have my Discord if you ever need to talk. I'm here for you.
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you all are so kind oh my goodness
thank you! 💛 -
Anytime mate, we all gotchu. ✨
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