I forgot how much I dislike my dad
- Locked due to inactivity on Feb 1, '21 3:54am
Thread Topic: I forgot how much I dislike my dad
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So I was out in the hot tub with my mom and all our dogs were out and they were running around playing and they started to get more aggressive with their barks and whatnot (which is what usually happens because there’s four of them and two of them are four months old and another one is a year and a half old and then the oldest one is 11) and so then my dad comes out with a f---ing broom and I see him trying to get after any of the three younger dogs. And so they’re all running away from him and then he finally gets close to one (I don’t know which one because it’s dark and the three younger ones are all black and I didn’t have my glasses on) and so I see him raise the broom up and swing down (I think he might’ve missed though) and I just immediately start yelling at him to stop and I swear to god this is probably the most that I’ve ever yelled at my dad and that’s probably because I’m very overprotective of my dogs. Like before when he would be yelling at me or whatever or that one time when I was younger and we were fighting, he actually grabbed me by the arms and started swinging me around and wouldn’t let go until my mom told him to stop, all of those times were relatively quick I would say, but this time, I was yelling at him for a good while and telling him to stop. At one point, one of the pups was near me (I was still in the hot tub) and my dad comes over and moves the broom (it’s one of the ones with thick and short rubber bristles, not the ones with hair or straw or whatever) so I just keep telling him no and to get away and am now leaning half way out the hot tub and having one hand on my dog while my other hand is pushing my dad’s hand away from grabbing him. But then he just goes over to the pup that’s now with my mom and grabs him by the neck and starts dragging him to the back door and that dog starts crying and whining so I start yelling at my dad again to stop and that he’s hurting him and I get out of the hot tub and go to the door and try to get my dad off of my dog, but he keeps blocking me, so I can’t reach him and then he gets the two younger ones inside, so I just go back and grab my towel and go back inside and start yelling at him again and he starts saying that he didn’t do anything wrong and that I should’ve been the one to do something then and then I told him that he was physically abusing the dogs and he said that it was his house and he can do whatever he wants cause those are his dogs and that when I move out and have my own dogs then that’s only when I can have a say in something and that if I don’t like it then I should just move out. So I just kept telling him that he was abusive and he said that he didn’t hurt them and I just didn’t know what else to say because he’s making me feel like I’m making things be bigger than what they are and that I’m somehow in the wrong and I just don’t know what to do
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It’s just I hate that every time I feel like I should try and make a better relationship with my dad, he does something like this. Like literally an hour ago I was telling my mom that I would be okay if me, her, and my dad all sat in the hot tub together some time because I think it would be nice and she said that she would bring it up to him, and then he goes and does this s---
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I'm sorry that you're going through that cx
Is there a way to keep the dogs away from him? -
i can actually relate to this alot
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Most of the time the dogs stay away from him anyways and they’re usually around just my mom and me
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Like I’m f---ing 23, and I decided to come back home for the holidays before I take off again next year and all my dad thinks that I’ve done is absolutely nothing and I know he thinks I’m f---ing up my life because I refuse to go into the military and he’s so goddamn controlling, so he doesn’t like what I’m doing
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And I just wouldn’t expect to be still dealing with this s---
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I think the worst part is that I’m starting to feel embarrassed about what happened. Or maybe not embarrassment but guilt? Basically a “why would I do that?” because now I know that he’s just going to make fun of me for this or keep pressing the issue and I won’t be able to say anything because I’m not able to get everything that I want to say out because it’s like my brain just has too many thoughts and I’m shocked that he acts like a child and he knows how to push my buttons and then my mouth just stops working with forming words and I can feel the anger in my heart and it feels like I’m about to explode before I just run off so I can go cry in my room
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I relate to this so bad
DOA, "controlling" is right -
Yeah, it f---ing sucks, bruh
And it’s a horrible feeling because there’s literally nothing I can do. He will never listen to me. And it honestly is probably a major reason as to why I’ve never had a boyfriend because I’ve always heard that your partners are like your parents or are suppose to be like your parents, so I’m terrified of finding someone like my dad -
And like I have no one to turn to in my life because I don’t want to burden them. Or if I start to tell them, then they turn it around to start complaining about something that happened to them without ever really acknowledging me and then it becomes me comforting them somehow
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Ey you mean when they say things like "But you have no idea how my parents were" and then completely change the subject and hence disregard your thoughts and feelings?
Also even though It's true somewhat that the past generations had rougher upbringings, it doesnt mean there's no rough part of it these days... in my opinion -
I don’t even get that. They just go “yeah... one time my parents did blah blah blah”
That’s true. I also think that just because the past generations had a rougher upbringing, doesn’t mean that that’s how it should be today. Like if you know how s--- it was when you were being raised, why would you want your own child to go through that? Like I know that my dad had a pretty abusive and POS father, which is probably why he says stuff like “oh that didn’t hurt” or “I’m not hurting you/them/whatever else” but still, it’s like why would you want to harm your own kids or animals? -
He claimed that what he did was to “put them in their place” and I don’t even know where to begin to tell him how f---ed up that statement is
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Yea... thats on an abusive level right there
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