New Beginnings on an Open Page
- Locked due to inactivity on Oct 25, '19 3:54am
Thread Topic: New Beginnings on an Open Page
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Whatever. I have no life ๐
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Mom says I've really matured in practicing tho
As in within the last few weeks
Which is a lot coming from her since she doesn't give compliments often -
I've actually done a lot of thinking today and realized that I really am thankful for my upbringing
I used to completely spew hate all over my mom but tbh she's a good person
I mean yeah it would have been chill to be allowed internet access all the time but it's been cool to figure out how to get it my own way
And she's certainly put up with a lot of my cringy self for the last decade and a half -
I used to think I was sort of an angel
At least that's what Mom always told me
And compared to my other two siblings I really was an angel
But I had so many issues and legit problems that I don't know how I wasn't murdered at four years old -
Damn I'm full-on ranting now
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I've been trying to figure myself out for the past week, and I've realized that I have changed so much that almost don't even know who I am anymore
Even within the past few months -
I clearly remember when Season 6 of RttE came out in February, that I thought "Oh yeah I'm almost identical to Snotlout's personality"
And I probably was
But then this summer conquering my fear of yellowjackets I uncovered the Astrid in me
And then I realized it's so stupid that I'm comparing myself to frickin cartoon characters
Like can't I just be myself
And since August I've transformed myself so drastically it's almost scary -
My mom's constant inflow of comments about me almost being sixteen have helped too
At first it made me mad but then the reverse psychology kicked in and I wanted to prove to her that I wouldn't be that way
Which I honestly don't know if that was actually her goal the whole time in making those comments
But I've really noticed an increase in respect and gratitude in myself just in the last few weeks -
I would just like to thank everyone on GTQ for not cyber-murdering me or suspending my account, even though I deserved it
You guys raised me. You really did. -
Still not checking email ๐คซ
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Hey, check your inbox. I need your help
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I didn't even realize until today
But I wouldn't survive going to school for one day
I'm too self-conscious
I was literally standing in line behind three or four clearly public-schooled kids about my age, and I suddenly felt super awkward like they were laughing and talking about me even though they very likely weren't
I could never deal with that pressure 24/7
So instead I'll be getting my bachelor's at 16
I guess it's a win-win then -
Just saw you XD
All right fine.
Hopefully I'm done ranting ๐ -
It's kind of important, and I have to get it done right away
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Nevermind
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