My OFFICIAL thread
Thread Topic: My OFFICIAL thread
-
^ double ^
I SEE A CONNECTION BETWEEN OUR DOUBLES -
What's the connection?
xD sometimes I have a hard time realizing that my double said that -
*said something
I'm not exactly thinking straight atm, sorry -
Oh the suspense!
-
Actually, my double is kinda funny. I should get to know you a little better.
-
Too many exclamation points.
It's alright.
Dooouuubbblllleee
XD -
That's it? Are you serious? Jeez.
-
Not responding to doubles.
-
XD maybe I should go on another of my accounts now
-
Yeeeaaahh probably.
-
.-.
Reading through all these posts between me and Alli...it's killing me... -
Oh holy s---
-
No one miss me?
-
I guess I should go, see all of you that are talking to me tomorrow. Oh yeah no one's really talking to me. Eh. Gnight no one.
-
So, I have had an century to think, and I think I need to bring up some infamous subjects... Alex, as long as I am here I will always want to cry and fall flat on my face, and if I am honest with myself, even typing this right now is making me unreasonably emotional and depressed. As long as I am here I will always cry about stupid first world problems and be the immature little snob I never left. I can't let myself lean on you every time I am hit with an wave of typical lack in self confidence, every time I want to cry because I feel overweight and ugly, or the times I feel rejected and unwanted . I can't sit here and expect you to let me cry on your shoulder when I want to be the b----y, selfish, irrational, lying drama queen I actually am, But, these tiny things aren't the only reasons I sit typing this.
I also can't stand here and force you to wear my deep burdens as I honestly struggle with a million medical
issues shared by both my family, and myself. I can't have you forced to bear my shame as I struggle to stay clean and not dehydrate myself severly or sneak into the medical cabinet late at night... I can't have you deal with me struggling to cope with being...sextually abused... and I certainly can't let you deal with me-- in the slightest way. My issues really do need to be my own and as you are my friend, one of my best friends, really, you are no longer allowed to hear any form of negative, degrading, depressive, dramatic, or just plain difficult things from me. I might give a friendly 'oh, work was hard' or 'I am tired' every here and there, but from now on our relationship will be the same as ant other relationship I have; which eventually will seem rather shallow compared to the depth we currently held in our relationship... I try to not to harasse my friends with my issues....
I keep saying you can't be the one to help me, but the reality always was that I can't be the one to rely on you to help me.
There are a million other f---ing things I want to say, but right now I can't figure out how to word them so just give up on me, okay.
Oh yeah, and I am sort for being so b----y to you lately. I really am sorry for all those nights I screamed at you for s--- that wasn't your fault and expected you to comfort me when (although you do t want to hear me say this) I really am not worth your guts,(I could list a thousand credible reasons why) and those times I would ruin your day because I needed to fume out stupid unchecked emotions and spread them like fire... and a lot of other things that were currently in my mind but now have left me...
Goodnight, Alex.
Post a reply as a guest or Log In
REMEMBER:
- Do not harass or insult other people. Treat others how you'd like to be treated.
View all 10 forum rules
- Do not harass or insult other people. Treat others how you'd like to be treated.
View all 10 forum rules
