I need sombody to occupy me.
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:14pm
Thread Topic: I need sombody to occupy me.
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@Roe.Lol yah cause I've lost people out of sickness before and I didnt care at the time,and now I feel bad about that.
@Arione.I'm pretty much the same.
and yah,I never dance at parties. -
im not shy i just feel weird talkin 2 people
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ilm i hope you feel better soon! :(
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@Jade: Oh I'm sorry about that. I didn't know. I found out today that a girl in my class was upset because her dad died a few days ago.
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Continued, it wouldn't let me post it all:
Blood. I try to fight to stay conscious, to believe that I’m fine. But I’m not, and I know it. I gasp and sputter, every breath paining me.
I call her name. “Liz,†it’s only a faint whisper. “Liz, I love you,†I say, but nobody could possibly hear it. I hear horns honking and the door is busted off. I feel someone against me. I smell vanilla with just a hint of sugar, and catch a glimpse of that brilliant blond hair. I hear her perfect, sweet voice.
“Oh God, oh…… Jesse don’t leave me,†some words are washed out. Breathing hurts even more. But for a second time stops. I feel her lips on mine, and the pain goes away completely. I try to call her name but my mouth doesn’t move. I try to kiss back, to hold her, stroke her hair, anything. Nothing. I feel like nothing. I can’t move, or hear anymore. I can only see. I see her crying into my shirt holding on to me. I feel like I need to comfort her, tell her I’m alive. I feel a pain so huge in my heart, that the rest of it doesn’t matter. Because this is not the last moment I wanted. This is not anything I would’ve wished for. Then I felt myself slowly slip away, and I suddenly saw my body there, limp, motionless, and bloody.
I was dead. Unforgettably, undoubtedly dead. And there was nothing I could do. I was gone. For good.
JESSE
You know, dying when you least expect it is pretty freaky. I mean, I was all excited and happy, and I had this warm feeling inside me. I was going to see Liz again. But those last minutes before I got there ended up ruining it all. My life, obviously, but mostly her life. That’s what I was mostly concerned about. And unless Liz could suddenly see and hear ghosts there was no way I could comfort her.
I sat there on her bed and watched her sleep, or at least try to.
It’s all my fault. If I had just gotten my head out of the clouds in time to see that SUV coming towards me earlier none of this would’ve happened. My car would’ve been a wreck, but it wouldn’t matter because Liz and I would still be together. I wouldn’t have to see her every night, waking up and screaming at the top of her lungs. I wouldn’t have to hear her sobs, calling my name, looking around the city at night. Oh, God, I wish I wasn’t gone, I really do.
I feel worse when I walk into her room while she’s sleeping and suddenly she gets really cold. She shivers frantically. That’s what I hate the most. Causing her pain and agony. I regret ever living. Sure, it was a nice life, but my life’s end shouldn’t result in Liz’s suffering.
I tried talking to her, through her dreams, while she was asleep one night. I love you Liz. With all my heart. I’m here, just in a different way. But my feelings for you haven’t changed. I still love you like Hell… and I miss you, too. The next morning in their small kitchen she was talking to herself saying things like, “He was there. I heard him. He’s not completely gone.â€
And her dad replying, “Uh. Honey, he’s gone. We can’t change that. But what you can do to help yourself is to move on.†She’d always become furious, storming into her room.
God, what a mess I’ve made of her life. I wish I could rewind time and just prevent myself from getting killed. But at least I’m somewhat still here, able to watch over her.
LIZ
Every day without Jesse would blend into the next. I was a zombie, a drone, robot, whatever you want to call me. Sailing in and out of things, not making even the slightest effort to move on. But how could I? He was the one thing I loved, the one person who made me feel whole.
Sometimes I get these strange feelings… these shivers. And whenever I get them I swear I feel Jesse’s presence. He’s haunting me. And haunting isn’t always a bad thing. In this case it made me feel semi-whole again. But I still would give anything to get him back. The hole in my heart is just too big to heal without him.
Before this I didn’t believe in ghosts. But now, I rely on believing. Without him somewhat here, I couldn’t survive.
Day in, day out; days turn to weeks. It’s been almost a month since Jesse got killed. One thing’s for sure – Life will never be the same – ever.
CARLI
Ever since that stupid accident that killed her boyfriend Jesse, Liz has been acting really weird. She doesn’t talk, or eat, or try at anything. She’s literally failing junior year. And I don’t mean to sound rude, but seriously, get a life! I mean, how long has it been? Like almost half a year? Yeah, she’s had lots of time to move on. But, no! She spends her time mourning and talking to walls. I mean, as if he was there. She’s so weird.
I honestly don’t know why I was friends with her in the first place. We have nothing in common. I guess she created a good image, I mean; she is the prettiest girl at the academy. I just don’t get why she chose him. The new kid… there was so many other more attractive guys to choose! Agh, who am I kidding, Jesse was like, the whole package. Good looks, great personality, and great chemistry. They were PERFECT for each other. I kind of wish he was mine instead of hers. I’ve been jealous of her ever since they got together. It’s just something Ben and I just never seemed to have. Sure, we look cute together, but we don’t have any chemistry at all.
Honestly, I feel bad for Liz. She loved him so much, and to have him die right in front of her like that, that’s harsh! But you just gotta rip the Band-aid off as quickly as possible, no matter how hard it hurts, because in the end, it saves you from becoming a lonely “widowâ€, so to speak. I just hope she gets over this faze FAST because being friends with a freak is definitely NOT a good image. -
@Swimmer: Aw thanksies, I'm sure I'll be fine. =)
I've gotta leave soon. Homework awaits. :/ -
so that's the prievew split into two parts. what do you think? :)
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@Roe.Oh,I feel sorry for that girl then.
I brb like in 5 min. -
@Alana: Well I'd read it, but I've gotta leave in a few minutes, I'll try and read what I can though, ok?
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(the 1st part is on page 4)
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@Jade: Yeah I do too and okay.
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yeah, that's okay roady.(:
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BRAVO ALANA CLAPS
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haha, thanks! :) *bows* theres more to it but im not gonna spoil it all!
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I read the first part and it made my blood run cold! (In a good way) and it was very emotional, I felt strange inside. It's bloody good, Alana!
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