What words or phrases do you repeat often in your stories?
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:29pm
Thread Topic: What words or phrases do you repeat often in your stories?
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The Author NoviceAlso, when writing, authors sometimes get stuck on a single object or feature and end up obsessing over it throughout the story. Although, sometimes it is good to repeat or focus on a certain thing to emphasize it's importance in the story. Just be sure you aren't sounding redundant.
Anyways, I usually use these too much or focus on them too often when writing:
running/ran/run
He said/she said/they said
The eyes of the character
I've learned to use words like hurried, rushed, or shuffled instead, depending on the context. I've also learned to put things like "He/she whispered," or "He/she shouted," or "He/she murmered," and so on, though I find it to sound wrong when I write using "He/she exclaimed." And though the eyes are important to me and typically fascinate me, I have to keep in mind that constantly mentioning how it showed in their eyes or the color of their eyes or how their eyes moved could bore, or worse, annoy the reader, or even myself afer rereading it.
Do you see how I'm doing it? If I come across a word or phrase that I can't figure out how to replace, I'll be sure to ask for some help. But for now, since I have absolutely nothing else to do, I'd like to hear about how you relate to me, and possibly help you out. -
Actually, though I don't post my peices on here, I usually reuse words like happy or sad or mad... You know, emotions and stuff. I really can't find replacements for them. Could I have some help?
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I used to do that a lot more too. I'm still working on expanding my vocabulary to not sound redundant. x3 Sometimes it helps me just to get the idea on paper first and then edit it with words and sentences that sound better.
As for what I find myself writing often, I think I tend to use things like "chuckled/smiled" too much. -
The Author Noviceilovepuppys: Well... As for happy, you could say elated, pleased, glad, or any other words. As for sad, you could say depressed, upset, teary, or others. Although, that is a bit vague. Could you give me an example sentence?
Anastasia: Yes, it's always best to get an idea first, get a scene down, and hen edit. I usually don't say chuckled. For some reason I always think of a granpa when U hear the word. Not sure exactrly why. Anyways, you could say laughed, or... I never really knew how someone would chuckle. I typically say things like giggle. As for smile, you could say grin, or smirk, depending on the situation. -
I tend to overuse the verb "said". I know other words I could use instead of "said", but I tend to write said anyway.
I also confuse past and present tense often. -
Well, it's okay to use said quite a bit. Just be careful. try not to sound like this:
Tanya stared into her brother's eyes. "I know you took my diary," she said. "No I didn't!" her brother said. "Of course you did," she said, "You always try. How did you even find it?" "I didn't find it!" said her brother. "I wasn't even looking for it!" "Oh yeah?" she said, "Then why isn't it there?" "Well..." her brother said. Just then, Tanya's little sister burst through the door. She plopped down on Tanya's bed and said,"I found a really good book." She squinted at the front cover. "It's called T-a-n-y-a-s D-i-a-r-y..." Tanya gasped. "How dare you!" she said.
Wouldn't it be better like this?
Tanya stared into her brother's eyes. "I know you took my diary," she insisted. "No I didn't!" her brother said. "Of course you did," she went on, "You always try. How did you even find it?" "I didn't find it!"argued her brother. "I wasn't even looking for it!" "Oh yeah?" she asked, "Then why isn't it there?" "Well..." her brother started, but decided not to finish, as he didn't know he aswer. Just then, Tanya's little sister burst through the door. She plopped down on Tanya's bed and said happily,"I found a really good book." She squinted at the front cover. "It's called T-a-n-y-a-s D-i-a-r-y..." Tanya gasped. "How dare you!" she shouted.
It is okay to use said quite a bit, ut don't overuse it, especially when using repatative dialogue, like:
"Yes, you did!" Tanya insisted. "No I didn't!" argued her brother. "Of course you di!" Tanya said. "Nu-uh!" "Yes huh!""Did not!" "Did too!" "Liar!" "MOM!!!"
As for present and past tense... Well, that would be easier to answer if I were a grammar teacher. -
As a general rule of thumb, it's good practice to always use said regardless of how the person is acting. Good dialogue fits into the prose of the story without drawing the attention to the fact that the reader is reading a story instead of experiencing it. Said is especially useful for this, as it's become so common that it's almost always skipped over unconsciously; thus maintaining the concentration of the reader.
On the side of the discussion you have 'said-bookisms;' words designed to take the reader out of the concentration to make them pay attention to how something is said. Exclaimed, pondered, bellowed, implored, bawled, hollered, suggested, noted, begged, murmured: these are all good examples of 'said-bookisms.' It's easy to see how these could be unprofessional in the prose though, which is why it's best to let the dialogue stand on its own legs.
Sometimes writers are tempted to use none verb bookisms in their writing though, such as hissed, laughed, belched, etc. To me, these are the absolute worse, and belong nowhere near a decent story.
Agree/Disagree?
P.S. It's easier to stick to one tense if you focus on a time and a character. Time here, of course refers to which tense you want to use in the first place; past or present, but character refers to the fact that 1. it's easier to keep thoughts together if you don't switch characters every couple of seconds and 2. it'll make you a much better writer if you can focus on a single character and their experiences, for a multitude of reasons. -
P.P.S. Please, Author, for the love of my sanity, please give each speaker their own line next time. That's basic stuff, and I'd expect a guy called 'the Author' to know that.
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