for a minute the world seemed so simple.
- Locked due to inactivity on Nov 15, '24 3:54am
Thread Topic: for a minute the world seemed so simple.
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“Yeah, exactly, please don’t get into the habit,” George said, wrapping an arm around Clay’s shoulder and running a hand through his hair. “You deserve to eat food, it’s nourishment for your body- especially since you do so much.”
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"I didn't make myself not eat, I just forgot to," Clay said, taking another bite of his sandwich. Well, that was at least half true. He hummed softly, leaning into George's touch.
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“Nah, because you picked up the sandwich and put it down again- that was deciding not to eat,” George said softly, watching Clay. “Y’know why I became a chef?”
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Clay exhaled softly, looking over at George. "Why'd you become a chef?" He asked, taking another small bite of the sandwich.
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“Because I had an eating disorder that was running my life, so my parents started letting me cook my own meals so I’d get more comfortable with food,” George said, shrugging a little. “And then I realized food isn’t scary and it’s actually beautiful, the art you can make with it and how it helps your body.”
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"Woah, you- Holy s---," Clay spoke softly, watching George for a moment. "Do- Do you still struggle with it now?" He asked gently, lowering the sandwich for a moment.
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“Yeah, from time to time,” George said, smiling proudly. “It doesn’t go away completely, the thoughts are still there. But- you learn that like, no matter what you do or how much weight you gain or whatever from eating, it’s worth it.”
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Clay nodded, looking down at the sandwich in his hands before lifting it to his mouth and taking another bite. He swallowed after chewing for a moment, exhaling. "Aren't like- aren't eating disorders like, based on body image and stuff?" He asked, keeping his eyes on the plate in his lap.
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“Uh, some of them are, yeah,” George nodded a little. “Why?”
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"Just- just wondering," Clay spoke softly, setting the sandwich down. "I- I don't have body issues- I mean, I guess I used to, but I'm pretty happy with, y'know, my appearance-" He paused, trying to figure out his words. He sighed after a moment, shaking his head. "I- never mind, I-I dunno what I'm talking about-"
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“You sure? Cause I don’t mind listening to you ramble,” George said softly, gently squeezing Clay’s shoulder.
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"I- I don't know how explain it-" Clay spoke, huffing softly. "I- I want to eat, but sometimes I don't and- I get so overwhelmed, and it's- what I eat is something I can- I can control?? I- I dunno if that makes sense or not, but I-I think that's as best I can explain it-"
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“So, your life is kinda out of control, and eating is kinda the only thing you can control? And it makes you feel in control for once?” George said softly, moving a hand to rub Clay’s back.
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"Kind of, yeah-" Clay muttered, nodding. He stared at the sandwich on his plate, exhaling shakily. "I-I'm just so overwhelmed, and scared-" He whispered, squeezing his eyes shut.
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“Hey, I get that,” George whispered softly, watching Clay for a moment. “Wanna try and switch it? How about instead of skipping meals in order to try and control your life, you could try and eat three good meals everyday? You can tell me what you want, too.”
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