losing hope and sleep v2
- Locked due to inactivity on Apr 1, '24 3:54am
Thread Topic: losing hope and sleep v2
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not sure where my old vent thread went so let's restart 😍
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i'm gonna have to refresh myself on proper forum etiquette, so for now i'll play it safe and post about my absence in here.
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i at least know to hide venting/triggering posts from the recent posts log, so here's your formal warning if you decided to click on this thread yourself
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so while i was gone, i finished my freshman year of high school, and started and finished my sophomore year. during that time i experienced a lot of paranoia about people hating me (as well as other thoughts), body image issues, extreme self hate, suicidal thoughts, and mental and verbal abuse from family, and it began to take a severe toll on my wellbeing. i started c*****g myself to cope, which in the long run did not help. to this day i still struggle with it, but it's for a healthier reason now. i st**ved myself to the point where i couldn't walk without nearly passing out, and i had to go to multiple doctors due to dehydration, malnutrition, and extreme weight loss. i got into therapy once i started experiencing crazy bouts of nausea prior to anything social, which just made my weight loss worse and more apparent to my friends and family. i've mostly gotten over the nausea, and am beginning the recovery process for my disordered eating, but i'm still trying to get rid of my paranoia. although with a lot of it still present, i think i'm in a place where i can confidently say i'm getting better :)
anyways just thought i should explain my absence and i didn't check for grammar or spelling mistakes so sorry :P -
i'm 99% sure i have bpd
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relapse core 😍
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i want to overdose so badly but i'm afraid that i wont take enough and it'll just badly hurt me rather than end me
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i am going completely wholeheartedly insane
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oh f--- i just started a whole chain of events f---
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well, either way, she'd know. might as well do it on my own terms
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holy f--- ashlyn
enzo is not your man. you have a long term boyfriend of 2 years and i'm literally a f---ing lesbian can i please be friends with him peacefully 💀💀 lets stop with the constant ellie bashing to him also bc i literally couldn't mean any less harm -
i hate wieiad posts it makes me feel so unworthy even though i do the exact same thing
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yes guys ! i'm anorexic, yup, got it, thanks. i know it, you know it, everybody knows it. no other discussion needed please stop talking about me please please please
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how am i supposed to tell my therapist that i almost killed myself wednesday
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that was one of the worst relapses i've ever had
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