Shrouded despair and forgotten ambitions
- Locked by Br0wnieBunny on Nov 23, '24 12:03amReason: thread owner request
Thread Topic: Shrouded despair and forgotten ambitions
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Lmfao alr. Thanks for letting me know xD
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It's fine... panic attacks don't last forever... you're not a disappointment, your mum doesn't think you're a cow, she just said it because she wants you to be better, she wants you to grow up and be a good person... it's fine... all teenagers are brats, they're all jerky, everything's going to be fine... you just have to prove you're not a bad person, even though she called you a bad person, she doesn't really think that... there are people out there who don't think I'm a brat, I just don't know where they are yet.. I just have to keep getting straight As and working hard and keep getting better and I'll finally be good enough and life won't suck and this panic attack will go away and everything will be fine...
i'll just keep doing my optional maths homework on that Education Perfect website because I have to be perfect and I won't be a cow or a brat and a horrible person everything will be fine.. -
And I can't contact any of my friends because she took my phone away but that's fine, it's not like i need to vent to anybody anyway, i'll just sort it out myself...
I'd just distract myself with maths homework and that heroes of olympus book I still need to finish and my art that will hopefully get good enough that they don't think i'm a horrible person and everything will be fine... -
maybe I'll just skip lunch today and practise my art and get better at maths and they won't think I'm a bad person anymore, I just need to make them proud...
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At least nobody will see this, so nobody will know...
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Eight years old and he's kicking and screaming
"I'll only go to school if you give me a reason
The kids are really mean and I already know
All the things they're teaching"
Hopped in the car, mama let him play hooky
Missed the first hour just to get a cup of coffee
She's the only one who saw who he was
No one else could read him
Showing up late but he makes it to class
Just to stare out the window and the clock in the back
He daydreamed away to a sky so gray
Everything's simple, it's driving him mental
Wishing everyday that something would change
Instead his dad makes him play ball by the bay
And every time he cries, father rolls his eyes, saying
"Son it's all your fault, how come you never try?"
He does all that he should
Why is he misunderstood?
This is a story 'bout a broken boy
With his headphones in just to block out the noise
Of everyone around him telling him the way to go
So he walks the world alone
Wondering if it gets better
Or if he's always gonna feel empty forever
So he gets lost tryna find another way back home
As he walks the world alone
Except in my story, my mum doesn't understand and it's both my parents shouting -
I should really stop wallowing in self-pity. Everything sucks, but that's my problem
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And I'm so privileged too... Like I go to an okay school, my family owns a couple properties, I have food on the table...
I feel like such a brat for being upset and being so overwhelmed, but I can't help when I have breakdowns and the fact she called me that didn't really help...
I'd vent to my friend but my mum took my phone away. That's why I haven't been venting here much, because my friend and I just vent to each other, I hope she's not worried I haven't texted her today, especially after she vented to me yesterday... -
Oh my god I'm so sorry, that's awful
You have a right to be upset, it's not like you're a bad person for feeling emotions (unless those emotions are murdering someone, no crimes allowed-) You're not a brat for feeling the way you do. And ik this vent was an hour ago so you might be fine now, but sTiLL -
Yeah, I'm not really feeling better... I just feel like a horrible person, like I'm a jerk or something because even my mother thinks I am
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You're not a horrible person. I know I've said this before, but the fact that you believe that and feel bad because of it shows that you're not a bad person, it shows that you're a good person with a decent amount of empathy and wanting to improve yourself, which if you were a bad person, you wouldn't care about that
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Yeah, I guess that makes sense. But still, I just feel so terrible and useless.
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You're not terrible or useless. That's a promise from a stranger across the world lol. I've met way more terrible and useless people in my life (hell, in a weekend). You're one of the coolest people I've talked to, so you're not useless or terrible
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Thanks lol. You're really cool too. I'll just have to manage at this point and get the hell outta here when I'm 18
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You're very welcome. Awww, thanks. Same plan here, lol
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