Stuff
- Locked due to inactivity on Oct 3, '16 3:54am
Thread Topic: Stuff
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I have a couple things wrong with me, as I mentioned previously. Two anxiety disorders (GAD and SAD for reference), BPD, bulimia, severe depression. I cut. I burn. Whatever, that's just me. Currently four months clean.
But yeah. BPD. It's not fun. Do you guys know what that is? It's f---ing horrible. Anytime someone's like "I'm going to sleep I've been up all day" I'm like "oh no what'd I do they must hate me) x100000, about everything. My mood will swing in 0.00001 second if you say something a certain way. It sucks. I feel every emotion amplified by a ton. Sad for me is literally suicidal. Like, I f--- up an order at work? Well maybe if I kill myself it will be a solution. It sound so ridiculous. It sounds like a f---ing joke. It's not. I have BPD.
And like, you get addicted to throwing up what you eat. I lost twenty pounds in the first month, and it was amazing. It was like an endless high, until, you know, I gained half of it back. And then j wanted to kill myself.
I work at McDonalds. My anxiety disorder keeps me from being able to ask to quit and yet I come home and want to die. I want to cut. It doesn't help my eating thing either considering now I have money and discount on food.
Did I mention that part of BPD is the overwhelming urge to spend your money? Yep. I spent my first paycheck in the entirety of three hours. On literally nothing. It was just s--- at the mall. Also a part of BPD is the urge to be destructive, which includes shoplifting. There are times when it's like I have no morals. The guilt then kills me haha. FML. -
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http:/ /thequietplaceproject. com/thedreamsroom/comfortspot
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55 minutes ago
There you go, cas. -
Thanks.
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guys I can f---ing vent on GTQ if I want. I've been here six years. Yikes.
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That website is all about anonymous venting, but people talk to you back. In my opinion, it helps. If you want to vent here, that's totally up to you.
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D: D: D:
first:OMG YOU STILL EXIST!!
and second :(((((( sad to see all this going on with you I hope you can find a way to get better I wish I knew a way
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