Confessions?
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:31pm
Thread Topic: Confessions?
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A whole lot of the time, images that come out of nowhere and that I don't really like pop into my head all so suddenly. Things like gore and sexual images. I hate it.
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I like to daydream. It's my escape, other than the internet. I love to pretend to be my own characters and act in imaginary settings. It happens out of nowhere, but I love it. But I hate it when people look at me why I do it. I wanna daydream, but do I want to be looked at or bothered when I am? No.
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*while I do it.
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I dislike makeup. As pretty as people look with it, I can't even...it makes me feel fake and plastic whenever I wear it. My mom says I need to care more for my appearance, but I don't like wearing makeup.
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The thought of romantically or sexually loving someone within my own consciousness or being in a relationship actually ever disgusts me anymore. I'm absolutely fine with others being in relationships, but there is nobody I am interested in or have ever felt an actual connection to. Not ever. Nobody I've dated. Online and real life. I might be picky, but love makes me comfortable because I'm awkward when it comes to romance.
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*uncomfortable
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I feel like she doesn't deserve some of the things she gets, like the attention or the position of moderator and other things. People sympathize her. People love her. She's just as angst as I am. She and I are equals. The hell? She's "just the most adorable most perfect little thing and she's so mature and kind" but I'm not?
Don't get me wrong, this isn't envy. It's confusion. -
I haven't daydreamed in a while. That feels weird. I daydream almost every second of the day, but surprisingly, I'm actually focused in reality. That isn't right. I'm going to put on some music and daydream.
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^I dislike makeup, which is why I never wear eyeliner, mascara, or lipstick. Natural beauty is the best kind of beauty, but society is too ignorant and superficial to see that.
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Exactly.
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Don't know if you were avoiding saying who the 'not envy' thing was about or not on purpose but it's obviously Dark, right? Or am I just really confused?
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It's Dark, you've got it right.
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It's probably due to the fact that I'm a horrible person. Selfish and greedy is all I am. Insensitive and pessimistic. I finally get it now.
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Alright. And you're not a horrible person. You're not selfish and greedy for wanting to be loved by your friends. I've told you that before, and so have many other people. If you want I can tell you honestly why I think she has all that and you don't, but you might find it slightly offensive, and it's just my opinion.
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Go ahead. Tell me the truth. Why does she have everything and I don't have anything compared to her? It's not like my mood would be any worse, it's already reached the bottom.
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