*sighs* well now I gotta do the recording thing!
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:26pm
Thread Topic: *sighs* well now I gotta do the recording thing!
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Tell me what to say and how to say it! :D
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Okay, this is how it goes. You get an orangutan. I'm not talking a little monkey or some dancing chimp, I mean a friggin orangutan. Don't ask me how you're gonna get a friggin orangutan, because that's not my problem.
So the orangutan's name is Clyde. This is non-negotiable; all orangutans are named Clyde. I don't know why that is, it's just how the world works. So, you and Clyde become man (and ape) about town. You're seen everywhere together, you make the scene. you and friends go out in big groups. you talk loud, you laugh louder. Every time you say something witty, you high-five the orangutan. The town begins to buzz. it gets back to her.
"Did you know that guy with the orangutan?"
"You used to date that guy with the orangutan?"
"Why'd you break up with the guy with the orangutan?"
Next thing you know, she's calling.
"I'm hoping we can still be friends. Wanna hang out sometime?"
"Geez, I dunno; me and Clyde were going to go to a monster truck race tonight (orangutans love monster trucks). In fact, the whole social calender seems kinda full. I tell you what, I'll make a little note (what was your name again?) and maybe I can squeeze you in. Oh, well, you know, you have my number so don't be a stra-- Hey, look at the time! I gotta skate, Clyde's making Mojitoes."
At this point the upper hand is yours. you can let her twist in the wind, you can draw her back into your life at the pace you decide. Whatever, it's your life. But if you're a smart man? You slowly phase her back in. you're IM-ing. you're talking on Live. You get invited to family functions. You bring Clyde, he becomes like one of the family. You're one big Brady Bunch. -
(hooray. more please :D)
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Your the kinda boy I wanna chew up in my bubble gum
I'm the kind gril you wanna chew up in your bubble gum
Take to yo mama's take take to yo mama's house -
(As fabulously as possible)
Hello everyone, it's wolf_heart, and I'm taking a short break from reciting to remind you all of how fabulous the user Selena112 is. You all should feel lucky to be graced by her presence on this website.
(Normal voice)
We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming. -
Alpha Kenny Body
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The dick, the cock, the BANANA!
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(I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE JAMES -o-)
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Slam !
Can you read my story ? Some of it I have so far?
And make a rant about that troll ? -
A random australian dude told me and my friends this paragraph once and we were laughing like hell...I can't tell whether it was because of his australian accent or the way he told the joke so you give it a shot...
"I heard once that there was a man with no name called Dork. He stole an empty car full of apples. He bumped on a dead bull and killed it. A blind and crippled man saw this and went to report it to an officer. When he got to the police station, he saw the officer talking to his deaf wife who was eating hot chips from the fridge...
And then I was at a meeting once and I heard this...
Good morning Ladies and Jellyfish. Today I want to tell you something I know nothing about. There is going to be a ladies meeting for men. Please come with your best clothes if you don't have any. Admission free- $10" -
XD it makes nooo sense
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Lol
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(More!)
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As she picked up the blade
The day began to fade
Into the moonlit night
She doesn't put up a fight
As she puts the blade to her skin
And presses further in
The emotional pain fades out
Without a doubt
Then the physical pain knocks on the door
And the blood knocks her to the floor
And it rushes away
Never to stay
This girl lies here dying
She was really trying
She couldn't do It
She had enough of this bulls---
As She turns grey
Her dying wish to be buried by the bay
That was the knife
That ended her life
Sadly this story was true.
All because of the likes of you.
(Say it in a British accent went catchy beat in the background) -
(*with a high pitched voice*)
Alien invasion!!!
(*awesome voice*)
Throw...The...CHEEEEESE!!!
(Also,)
I baked you a pie!
Oh boy what flavour!?
PIE FLAVOUR!
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