My turn to make my very own thread.
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:21pm
Thread Topic: My turn to make my very own thread.
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Yes?
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I don't wanna live anymore.
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Niecey, please don't say that. I need you to live..
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But I don't want to. It's finally sinking in that he's not coming back. I can't even cry now because I'm in front of my parents.
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Niecey, I know how selfish this is, but I need you to stay alive. I hardly knew him and I feel dead inside. I can't lose you... I don't know how I'd survive knowing you told me you didn't want to live anymore, and nothing I said was enough... And I know loss hurts... I know that very well.. I know it feels like nothing will ever be alright again. But please... I don't want to lose you..
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*sigh* it just doesn't seem like him. I just keep telling myself it's not him, but the eyes, the birthday, the location. . . She wouldn't lie but I just can't accept he's gone and now I am. Slowly and painfully it's sinking in.
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I know, Niecey... At some point, you start to cry anytime something reminds you of them, or when you can't help but think, "They would have...."
Later on, it gets to the point where you can talk about the good memories, and smile, and maybe you'll cry every now and then... But at some point, your heart understands the loss.... And all it can do is be happy for the time it had with them...
This isn't helping. I'm sorry. I know it hurts... I'm so sorry, Anna. I'm so sorry.. I can't do anything to fix this, and I'm sorry. But please stay with me.. -
. . . I'm just going to go for now.
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I'm sorry.... Goodbye...
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Fuck you, life.
Fuck you, death.
Fuck you, misery.
Fuck you, happiness.
Fuck you, everything.
Fuck you, nothingness.
Fuck the world that never gives us a break... e.e -
What was that thing dad was saying? Oh yes.
Life sucks. It only gets worse.
Fuck it all. -
I keep thinking there could have been some purpose. No. There was no reason. What the hell did anyone learn, or regain, or any of that shit that might mean it wasn't in vain? Nothing. There was no reason. Damn you. God, if you're real.... Why the hell would I want to follow you?
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I don't know what to say now.... Help me...
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I'm sorry...
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But there's no one to forgive me, is there...?
My eyes are burning..
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