Death at Your Fingertips
Thread Topic: Death at Your Fingertips
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Want to stop existing...
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My stomach won't stop...
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Therapy made me sad...
I didn't want to think about those memories, and then we ran out of time, so there wasn't any time to stabilize...
Now I'm just drained more than I already was... -
I feel pathetic...
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TW
I just remembered how I ended up with anorexia to begin with...
We just had some appetizers for dinner. I was full but literally only had two left, so I decided to make myself a little container for tomorrow so I'd have a decent amount to eat instead of just saving the two and probably not eating them. But then, half of the folks in this house were all b----ing about how many appetizers I was going to get and why I was hoarding food when it would be here tomorrow. First of all, with the amount of people in this house, we all know that's a lie. Second of all, I've been sleepless at night, I'm not allowed to eat until morning, I crash right before sunrise, and I don't get up until after lunchtime, so that stuff would definitely be gone. Back when I used to eat, I was seen as a pig. When I stopped eating as much, I was accused of purging. I was labeled again and again as bulimic until I lost the will to eat much of anything. I'm already feeling self-consciousness about all other aspects of myself. The last thing I need is to not be able to eat at all again...
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I'm trying so f---ing hard... I don't want to hate anybody, but they really push me...
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I hate this because this is the type of memories that were brought up during therapy, and apparently it's still an issue to this very day...
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I think I need to get that locking journal...
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...I think I need to have money, first....🙃
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My nose...
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1. Clo ♀ (S)
2. Rez ⚧ (O)
3. Mackenzie ♂ (O)
4. Frankie ♀ (S)
5. Candy ♀ (S) -
1. Adventurous, awkward, curious, determined, openminded. Gamer vibes
2. Dauntless, frank, sharp, introverted, protective, loyal, gentle. Punk vibes
3. Creative, outgoing, reliable, funny, stronghearted, leader. Skater vibes/music lover
4. Bubbly, silly, genuine, extroverted, eccentric, passionate. Grunge vibes
5. Sweet, direct, intellectual, confident, modest, joyful, collected, patient. City vibes -
Clo
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Rez
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