The Rose Garden
Thread Topic: The Rose Garden
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Yep! <3
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So, 2 weeks ago my grandfather died. But even before then, I was feeling horrible about myself! I was miserable, I hated my life, I would NEVER get enough sleep, and whenever someone yelled at me, I would start smiling and then they would get mad.
The way my mother told me about my grandfather, was MESSED UP! I still remember that night, she had started screaming when my grandmother called her. When my brother and I asked what was wrong she said, "Papa passed away." and then she went upstairs.
My brother stayed with my little sister while I had gone to a separate room. I started screaming, crying, punching, and there was nobody there to comfort me. I was all alone. I had considered suicide multiple amounts of times, but as I said, life was worth living. I put on a fake smile and started comforting everybody. My dad asked if I was okay. But nobody else did. NOBODY.
After the incident, I had started going on threads on GTQ. My mother hates it when I'm online, but being online with all of you is my comfort zone.
My brother has always hated me. He says it to me everyday. What I want to know is, why he spends time with my little sister, and never me? HE EVEN SAID HE LOVED HER! I ALWAYS DREAMED OF HAVING THE PERFECT BIG BROTHER WHO WOULD COMFORT ME AND LOVE ME, BUT I WILL NEVER HAVE THAT. HE NEVER HESITATES TO HURT ME.
My mother. She is half the reason I'm like this. She is always so f----ing stern and never lets me do anything. She says that she wants to be the "fun" mother, but she can't, because she feels like Jesus is calling her to be stern with us. I'm sorry, but you can STILL be fun! Get this. One night we were having a conversation, and I had burst into tears. Yes, my mother comforted me and told me things would be different. Was it? No. The next day, she started screaming at me because I didn't understand a simple math problem. She always yells at me, and most of the time when she does, she will hit me or want to hit me, but starts telling me how worthless and useless I am to the family.
My dad. He says he will talk to my mother, but HE NEVER DOES! He always takes HER side! Even if my mother is in the wrong! I wrote an entire f----ing diary entry about me wanting to end my life. Did he do anything about it? He said I shouldn't be like that, but he did nothing to change it. He never took me to a therapist, nothing. -
That's awful. You're so strong for enduring all of that and I want you to remember that I am here for you if you need me <3
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Tysm Spice, that's means a lot to me.
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No problem, buddy.
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Night everybody! ^_^
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Valorous night, June!
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I can't sleep TwT
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Neither can I! TwT
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What do u wanna do?
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I suggest sleeping TvT
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I'm not tired ;-;
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Then what do you wanna do? :0
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Be on GTQ or online anywhere where I can chat with people TwT
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That sounds fun lol
But everyone's gone except for us, phooie >:0
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