Without an End
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:22pm
Thread Topic: Without an End
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:I I need input please.
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You're so good at this..
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Thank you.
The Plan
"The rogues?" Hale scowled, focusing her clear pink eyes on the spots marked on the map.
"The oldest ones at that. The first DragonFly, Moth, and Hebe." Kida stated, pointing to three different locations in turn.
"Can they be trusted?" Amber, a gold armored DragonFly asked, leaning against the table.
"Not in the slightest." Kida responded.
"That's reassuring..." Hale sighed.
"Oh, come on! This will be fun!" Kida said, not meaning a word of what he said.
"I guess we should get going, then." Shadow, a black cloaked Moth spoke up from his position guarding the door. His white hair fell to his waist.
"I suppose.."Hale nodded, rolling up the map and sticking it into her bag. She checked to make sure her gun was still at her side.
Kida stood, walking to the door and forcing a smile to reassure his team.
"Kida.." Hale said, walking over and touching his hand lightly "You look like you're in pain."
And with that she walked outside, Amber flanking her.
"You kinda do." Shadow added, running outside before Kida could punch him.
Kida frowned, then walked outside, following them. -
I need more input before I type up the next to chapters.
Oh, and just to tell you, I've based these characters off of you guys.
I'm Hale.
Maybe If I get more people to read this I reveal who the others are.:P -
Input: There's a lot of dialogue- I think it could be a bit better with further detail. But I love it so far, so~
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I see. I've been told I add too much description and not enough dialogue, so this time I tried more dialogue.
I shall...try and fix this. w.w -
:O OH GOD I SORREH FOR CONFUSION.
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No no it's fine.xD
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