Blue Veins Help Needed!
- Locked due to inactivity on Oct 8, '17 3:54am
Thread Topic: Blue Veins Help Needed!
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I recently started writing a short story but I don't know how to finish it. Can anyone please help?
Blue Veins
It sounded like there was a young girl
chocking then calling "daddy" as she keeled over and her last breath left her blue, ice cold lips for the last time.
Her dad rushed to her and
attempts to dislodge the dagger wedged tightly in her throat. The despair he feels is almost tangible, as if her death has ignited something in him. A burning fire who's thirst will not be quenched until his daughter's death is avenged.
He leaves the stable, a
scheme already forming in his head as he lets the fire inside of him rage and feed off his hatred towards those who killed his daughter. It is imperative that he finds the men that robbed the life from his little Elaine and that he takes there life in return. A tooth for a tooth; an eye for an eye; a life for a life.
That night as he lay tossing
and turning, restless against the pain he felt for his lost one, he heard a scratching at the window. Nathan went to check what it was but let out a sigh of relief at the sight of the old oak's branch against the glass. The truth was he was scared. He wasn't a bloodthirsty man, nor a vengeful one. After his wife died three years before it had left him broken - an empty shell; a hurt soul. He was lost without first his wife, and now his child.
He lay back down as the
nightmares engulfed him once more. Tomorrow was another day. Maybe a better day. Maybe...
Nathan woke up to a bright
sunlight peaking through the open blinds. The laughter and excited squeals of the neighbourhood children rang through the window. How could anything be happy after what had happened yesterday? All he could feel was a weighted sadness, tugging at his heart. Nathan had lost the will to live.
The fear was suddenly demolished as he
picked up the blade. A sharp point, so capable of harm. The blue vein pumped with warm blood as he lifted the the knife to slit his wrist. All that was left now was to bring it down and end his suffering...but he couldn't do it. No matter how hard he tried to muster up the courage he just couldn't. He still had so much to live for, Nathan realised as he whispered to himself, "why die now?".
His daughter would never
feel pain any more. Wasn't that a good thing? If there was a God up there wouldn't Elaine be looking down on him too? He now had to live his life for both of them. He owed his little girl that much. -
Le1F Experiencedew
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Because it's a bit gory?
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You say you need an ending? What kind of ending would you want?
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This story isn't gory, but I do love the idea that you put behind it.
If you want the character to continue living, let them get a job, do something simple that adds more detail to the character, then whenever you do get another idea for something to happen after that, add it :3
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