Writing Exercise!
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:28pm
Thread Topic: Writing Exercise!
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This thread is all about practicing tone in dialogue. Try to get the idea of what your character is saying across without using adverbs for their speech. If you do it well, you should be able to get the point across through their actions and what they say. Try it! Here's my example. I never used adverbs with speaking verbs.
Rainwater sloshed about the dirt and leaves in the gutters above, before it filed into the downspout and out onto one of the many 4x4 squares of cement bordering the small, one-way road.
On the stairs beneath the gutters, a young woman peered out the screen door, a suitcase in each hand. She looked back at the end of the kitchen as an elderly woman, who was shorter than the girl but clearly resembled her in many ways, tottered over to the door.
She reached up, cupping the girl's face in her hands. "Don't look so sad, birdie, you know Nanna loves you." The crowsfeet at the corners of her eyes became more defined as she smiled. "Besides, your university is only four hours, not a world, away."
She girl smiled back, though her smile had a touch of sorrow to it. "I know. I'll just miss you." She set down the suitcases and pulled the old woman before her into a tight hug. Nanna returned it with a strength not expected in such a frail woman.
"Don't leave your friend waiting much longer," Nanna said, letting go of her granddaughter and handing her the suitcases. "Call me when you two get there."
"I will," the girl said, and with one last kiss on her Nanna's cheek, walked out of the house. She ran down the driveway to the idling grey car. The back seat door was already open, and the interior was slightly wet from the rain. The girl put the suitcases on the seat and slammed the door, then climbed into the passenger seat in front. She smiled at the driver. "Alright, I'm ready to go."
"What did she say?" the driver asked. The girl didn't know what to say. Nanna was almost the driver's grandma as well, considering the two girls in the car had known each other since kindergarten. The girl leaned back in her seat, contemplating an answer. Rain pattered on the window, and rolled in short-lived races toward the hood. Finally she had it.
"She told me... she told me everything's going to be okay." And with that, they drove so far the worries couldn't catch up, to new possibilities only four hours away from memories left until Christmas break. -
Gracious NoviceHey, m sorry I have not read it cuz its so
long First tell what it is about
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Good exercise.
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