Help
- Locked due to inactivity on Jul 20, '22 3:54am
Thread Topic: Help
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So lately I've been thinking that I need to break up with J.
I still have some feelings, but the spark is gone, we're just staying together for the sake of staying together. We barely act like a couple and it's been bringing more hurt than good.
It's been this way for a while now, but every time I think about doing it, he'll be say or do something and my foolish brain goes, "Well maybe we can actually fix this."
But every time I try it doesn't work. At this point I just need to be real with myself that it's not going to happen.
I was planning to actually do it, not just thinking about doing it, tomorrow, that way in case he needed the weekend to recover or think or something, I don't know if there's really much to recover from, though.
But the past couple days, things have been going a little better and my heart is getting that stupid hope again and I don't know how to stop it. -
Well, it really depends on what the problem is. Is it a rough patch due to circumstances or is it something that just came naturally. I can't give a good answer without kinda knowing what's up.
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It just came naturally.
Like I said, it seems like we're only staying together for the sake of staying together. Our relationship is dead. If someone looked at us, they wouldn't be able to tell that we're a couple. If we didn't have the label of boyfriend and girlfriend, I wouldn't even be able to tell. -
I understand. If you two don't feel like there's really anything left between you, I suppose breaking up would be best. Better than staying together and torturing each other. You'll both be free to find your right fits. Sometimes I just happens. Doesn't mean you were a bad person.
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Unfortunately, my heart isn't listening to that. Like, it's hurt but it's still holding on for some reason, hoping for some way that the relationship can last.
I think I'm just going to have to suck it up and break it, deal with the pain afterwards. -
I can promise you, it will hurt, because I've been there before. What's hurting you moat is that this was a relationship you wanted to last because who doesn't like the feeling of being loved? But, if you keep with it at this rare, it will only drain you, and you'll feel worse later on and wonder why you let it go on for so long...
I'm not trying to make you feel any worse than you already do, but I just want you to be prepared for it.
And if you need someone to talk to through the process, I'm here. 🖤 -
*most
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Don't worry, I need to squash my heart beforehand so that I don't back out.
And thank you -
I'm going to do it today
This already hurts
Wish me luck -
There's only one way his reaction wouldn't be bad, which is if he agrees.
But it would also on how he says he agrees too.
And out of all the other possible reactions, the one way that he agrees is likely not to happen -
I did it
And his reaction was just right.
We'll still be able to be friends, I think. -
It's funny, I thought I was going to come home a complete crying mess.
But I actually feel the opposite, freer, somehow.
And you know how sometimes your dreams are your brain communicating with you?
I had one last night where I was looking through this thing that was basically an electronic journal that belonged to J.
There's one line in there that I remember referring to me that said, "She says she's happy, but I'm not sure she is."
I don't think I realized that our relationship was holding me down.
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