ok this is epic
Yeah, that’s right- those are EYES, NOT EARS. And they are absolutely flawless. It's like Mr. Krabs banged a komodo dragon and this was the ungodly offspring. I wonder if those stalks are prehensile. Perhaps there is an undiscovered regional variant that has evolved massive eyes the size of palm trees that it uses to strangle its prey to death. No doubt such a creature would inevitably destroy the ecosystem it resides in as no other Pokemon would be capable of fighting back against its slimy peepers.
Appletun hails from the frigid heckhole known as Soviet Union, where he had given birth to his kids, Roysten, Ziggy, and 3D Billy Bob Jr. the 5th. He and his kids were beaten on a daily basis by their abusive step-father. In a gamble to provide his kids with a better life, he and the kids fled the country in a desperate attempt to make it to America for a better life. After much struggle and several close calls with the Militsiya, the foursome made their way to New York City. They faced harsh discrimination and ridicule for their Soviet origins, but Appletun did everything in his power to provide his offspring with a better life than his. Only in modern times have they been accepted by American society. Appletun currently resides in Deadwood, South Dakota working part time in a local grocery store to pass the time after his retirement. Ziggy and 3D Billy Bob Jr. the 5th are co-owners of a successful fast food chain specializing in Indian cuisine. They have opened a grand total of seven locations since the buisness was founded in 2010. Roysten was tragically killed back in 1994 in a freak accident involving a boulder and a grill.
