Is Your Character a Mary Sue? | Comments

My character feels like the cliche Mary Sue, so I was surprised she only got 18%.

Her name is Jaci (pronounced like Jackie). She's fourteen years old, lives with her parents, and owns two dogs, Goldie and Cocoa. (They're named after their coat colors) Her hair is a light brown and her eyes are emerald green, so she''s not that far of in the appearance department other that unusually bright eyes.

Her grandmother was a jeweler who loved to collect crystal figurines. One day when Jaci was visiting he grandmother, a brutal car accident occurred. Her grandmother sadly passed away in it. Jaci fell into a depression. She had loved her grandmother so much, and she felt like it was her fault because she was the one who suggested they drive to the ice cream parlor instead of walking. Jaci's family inherited her grandmother's collection of crystal figurines. Most of them are kept in a large wooden cabinet that is locked at all times. However, Jaci keeps one of them in her room. It's a beautiful red figurine of a cardinal. She loves this one specially because she helped pick out this one with her grandmother at the shop (I threw a little symbolism in there; cardinals are symbolic of a deceased loved one being near).

One day, a relative shows up at her house looking to take one of the figurines. She is known among Jaci's family for being a severe alcoholic who will sell anything to buy more booze. While trying to shove Jaci out of the way, she accidentally knocks over her cardinal figurine. It hts the ground and shatters. Jaci is furious. This is where she learns she has the power to turn things into crystals/precious gem.

At first, she is worried everyone will despise her for her power. She runs away and meets a strange creature in the forest, which she quickly befriends.

I'm still working out some plot holes, pacing issues, and such with my friends, but what do you think? Any ideas/suggestions for me o add? :D

Hey! I took this quiz about my OC Paisley (she's a bat) and I got 23%. Her 'tragic backstory' is getting abused/cheated on by her ex-boyfriend. Nothing too tragic. I agree, she could use a bit of spicing up. This quiz is helpful and I'll probably be taking it with a few other of my OCs.

10%
this is nice
welp

expec ted higher because she has amnesia and is severely obsessed with a main character because that character is very familiar to her.

and the character she finds familiar finds her familiar too, personality wise.

And has a tiny soft spot for her.
but is also mean.

And is somehow she's that character's apprentice.

Becaus e it's that characters fault how she got in the story the first place.

Very very very long story.

I got 6%. Thought I'd get more tbh

Ayaki Sato is her name. She's my Bungo Stray Dogs oc (one of the many), she works as a doctor for the Port Mafia. Despite mostly being understanding, anxious and a doormat, she's an hyper-competent doctor, and medicine attracted her from a young age. She enjoys saving people... And her good traits end there. In order of entering medicine, she ran away from home (she didn't care about her old parents anyway) and stalk a doctor that worked for a criminal group and repeteadly attempted to make him teach her, until he did. She learned greatly and has a abnormal talent for medicine, but she isn't usually hired due to not actually having a formal education, and got fired from the little borderline illegal hospitals she actually worked for as a nurse, due to having a severe issue related to shouting or even hitting other nurses or doctors for little mistakes, sometimes mistakes she caused by overworking them and acting like she's their boss (which nobody appreciated). She strongly believes it was THEIR fault for being "awful doctors" and she HAD to command them, which is bulls---. She's too passionate about medicine and believes that people NEED her, and specifically her. She lacks a set of morals, and started working for the Port Mafia, since they didn't require a full education and she knew they likely needed doctors, and would give them the respect she deserves.

She saved another OC of mine, Shinai Mahoou, who has the Ability of modifying (not creating or destroying new molecules, simply modifying them) the general molecules of things and people alike. He's nor a villain nor a hero, and simply roams about with little purpose. Ayaki saved him after a surprise attack that left him almost dead, and he respects her greatly, and is even a bit bizarrely too grateful, even for the average person. That said, he's kinda the only person that respects her so much... You know, doormat doctor in a mafia and all...

I got 23% for my DnD character, Valentine. He is a tiefling bard turned serial killer. He hunts down the people involved with the brutal murder of his mother, often adding people who remind him of said killers to his list. I made him for our villain campaign and he's been very fun to play so far. He does show empathy for survivors of abuse as his mother was one as well and he is a FIRM believer in "if you have been wronged, return the favor tenfold". He fully believes that he is a hero in his mind doing everyone else a favor as he takes out people he deems as immoral and abusive. His family was a part of a circus which is why I decided to make my villain a bard, who is currently multiclassing warlock who serves Desirat. I'm not planning for him to change his ways as I've decided he's been doing this long enough to where there is no turning back, especially considering there is a hefty bounty for his head and he refuses to go to jail. He does not have a happy ending, find the love of his life, gets married, and has kids off in the country. He reopens the circus where the tragedy started and devotes himself to Desirat. He continues to conduct horrific murders and becomes his own demented ringleader.

I got %20-%28, I did it bc I was curious! My character is Kounna okami, shes the daughter of inari okami the Asian goddess. Shes a kitsune and she lives in a camp with other demigods like her, the questions that I think made it so high was 1. She dont have a remarkable singing voice but its decent enough for her to sing to her kids so I was kinda stuck, 2. She didnt die and come back Alive but she was in a coma at one point but i think I answered no and 3. Is being a demigod royalty? I dont think so but idk

Vale Sayer is the character I tested out at 16% a Mary Sue, which I think is rather impressive for my Level 14 age. His story is that he was born in London, England in the 18th-19th century, and had a normal childhood, but when he was 19, he was accused of murder and was executed for a murder he didnt commit. The name Vale Sayer is an alias, and he is referred to with many other names, but he is a thief with a bounty on his head the fake names are necessary to keep himself out of prison, as he has negative connotations of prisons, jails, and the cops (which in the afterlifes are called the Badges, which is headed by seven people who control all of the afterlifes government called the Council), because of his past.

He does have one illness, which in this world is called "corruption', which essentially causes a soul's body to slowly deteriorate, which is a big part of his character, as I imagine that growing up, he worked as some construction worker/farmhand, and he is supposed to act as the muscle or semi-powerhouse of the main 6, so him having an illness that would weaken him is a good negative trait or setback in my eyes. The only real supernatural trait about him is the mark around his neck that he received as a kind of like a branding from his hanging, and his eyes, which are a kind of pale green caused by the effects of the afterlife, and his corruption combined, as his eyes before death were hazel, but going to the afterlife turned them dark green, and when he got corrupted the color sort of drained from his eyes.

He also is sort of the groups older brother figure, being one of the first members of a small ragtag group of thieves which consists of the other members of the main 6. Together they go around, stealing and scamming their way through the afterlife to put food in front of them, all while being chased around the nation by the badges. There is more to the story than just stealing, as Gods and Goddesses exist, but since Im planning on making this into

--12%---
name: H-37s

Species: Idk she has demon horns a plugin tail

age: unknown but looks 14
hair: black
skin color: black

shirt: a white shirt with a strap that leads to cuff with japense writing that means: too cute

demon horn: neon green (left), hot pink (right)

tail: rainbow

sock color: neon green (right) hot pink (left)

shoes: neon blue and yellow
eye color: neon blue
----------
sexuality: Asexual
romantic attraction: panromantic
favorite music artist: girl in red

lore: long story short she was created by my inventor oc

I got 31% which I believe is a little bit low for a Mary Sue, My character is named Lucas Rainbow and his a ghost hunter. My story focus on a cast of mythology monsters trying to find a way to co-exist with humans. Anyways, His goal is to find the murder who killed him called Killmore, He take an appearance of an older teenager but is actually around 50 years old. Were nothing alike appearance wise, Lucas has turquoise and Blonde hair, But, When he manifest the devil instead of him, He transformed into his evil persona called Shadow Lucas which has Red eyes and Black hair. Personality however, We got somethings in common. Lucas is a nature-lover, kind,weird, honest, loving, empathic, and brave hunter that loves to go outdoors and adventure. Me and him may not have the same hobbies but we both are kind, smart and empathetic. Lucas does get emotional and easily stress of things. He gets trigger easily if someone disrespect nature, And he make irrational decisions which lead to huge consequences. Lucas will put other characters first before himself, That usually also lead him into more traps, manipulation, and more stress in his journey. However, Lucas is able to put himself at a disadvantage and always find a way to rise against his foes. Then he has some non heroic characteristics such as a tendency of getting revenge. Lucas does have some Mary Sue qualities such as being a role model but it doesnt take him away from being human since he makes a lot of mistakes and then those mistakes into knowledge. And naturally, Everyone has a role model in their life. I hope to see my character grow in the story. Lol

I got 19% Mary Sue, I could probably still add some more to her personality/character though. I'm writing a Star Wars fanfic with an OC named Lania, she's human with brown hair/eyes, the story starts off and she's around 12 then there's a time skip. She's a force-sensitive and is living on Jakku with her guardian named Tey who eventually gets killed in front of her by the Seventh Sister. Lania, I try to portray with the emotions: hatred, whatever-goes-bad-it's-my-fault-usually, but emptiness too. She ends up getting trained by the Grand Inquisitor because I want there to be ties to the TV series Rebels, but I hope that I can get Lania's darker personality right also the Grand Inquisitor's personality too. At least Lania wasn't as much of a Mary Sue as I thought.

19%. I guess that was good? My character is an alien animal who wants to be human. Nothing can help them because there is no magic. Though they act just like a person most other characters are human. So they don't fall in love with anyone. For the tragic past. They were taken by humans to become a pet over and over. Until, one person saved them.

I did this on my villain character Squirrel, a tall brown cat, with slightly darker stripes. I always thought of his voice/personality based off of the character Toffee from Star Vs the Forces of Evil . I am nothing like Squirrel-yet he got a 23% (which is quite a popular percentage) I am not an anthropomorphic brown cat, note do I wear pullover gray sweaters with white collars, nor am I a male, nor am I responsible for a loved ones death. Squirrel is very witty and calm, I am very dumb and chaotic.

Also this quiz used the r slur, you know, the one used to make fun of and harass people with autism. I know they dont mean any harm with it, but they really shouldnt have used it anyways.

I got a 22%. So my character, Azura, is an awkward lil baby with social anxiety and only a couple close friends (really inspired by my current life situation HUH). Backstory time :) so she had a friend named Pepper, and she acted as her protector against bullies and such. Now, as the years went on, Pepper became much more confident and Azura went in the other way, as family issues developed she felt more and more as if she couldnt say a word at home or else some kind of object would be thrown at her. As a result, she relied more and more on Pepper for emotional support, but some things happen and they get into an argument. A lot of things happen, but long story short Azura ends up killing Pepper. Yeah, not the greatest thing to do when the person you killed is your best friend who is also your only emotional support? So yeah thats all where I have the story so far? I do have another bit planned where Pepper somehow comes back to life (something to do with her being of a species with an ability that grants a second life chance or something) and then a bunch of confusion follows? I have no idea. About her appearance, shes around 14-16, Blue hair with a white streak, One eye is a lighter blue than her hair while another is pure black, like more black than the kind of natural, and shes quite small, wears baggy hoodies and other loose fitting clothing because she only really gets clothes as hand-me-downs from her older brother minus her school uniform which she saved up for herself. Honestly introducing her to strangers has really got me in some inspiration to develop her story, so maybe give me some ideas on what could happen next?

Fifteen percent huh, well then.

My character is an angel-human hybrid. Whos extremely selfish and cruel but but everyone likes her anyway because shes pretty. She dresses very slutty and has had many boyfriends previously. Shes a feminine bad girl in a sense. Her hair is reddish and is brown set up in two ponytails and bangs. As a child, she got raised by her sister because her parents died in a car crash. And her sister really didnt care about her, which is why she is the way she is. Shes about seventeen years old and lives with her best friends. Shes basically a bully but she usually harm the victim more mentally than physically

I took the quiz for my OC Acacia. She was stolen at the age of 2 and taken into a royal family (stay with me here). She has an incredible memory and remebers bits of her past through nightmares. She doesn't like to talk because she has a raspy voice. Anyway, Acacia doesn't look too out there. She has long, black hair and dark blue eyes. I'm surprised she only got 24% because I thought she would get more from the "kidnapped and taken into royalty" bit.

So my character is a wizard (not a Harry Potter fan character I promise), who wasn't raised by his real parents, could easily win a fight as long as the other party isn't overpowered, he's a genius, he's calm (actually depends on the situation), he has yellow eyes, he's kinda attractive in that cute way... and he's only 16% mary sue (or gary sue). I mean I guess he has actually more flaws than strengths...