just venting on and on and on and on...
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:14pm
Thread Topic: just venting on and on and on and on...
-
love is a monster. and evil, possessed, eerie soul, lingering in the shadows, betraying its beholder in many ways than just one. love has never liked me, nor ever paid any attention worth its while to me. i will never be loved. there is no special some one out there for me. i'm not somebody anyone would ever dream of loving. sure, some people might think i'm cute and crap, but nobody will ever accept me for who i am. nobody will ever let me be my true self around them. my friends have taught me this through words that can't be repeated because of their cruelty and pain. when i see couples laughing and hugging and kissing, i long for that same thing. but i know it will never come. i've lost hope. i'm a nobody. i'm worthless. i'm stupid. i can't do anything right. nothing can convince me otherwise. since i can't find any happiness of my own, i've made it my duty and life's purpose to bring happiness to others. atleast i can enrich other people's lives. atleast i can see something good come of me. but i will never ever be truely happy. and that's just the way it is going to be. i was at the wrong place, at the wrong time, with the wrong friends. they hurt me more than imaginable. but they also made me stronger. i don't know who to trust. i don't think i could know. ever since the lies started they've never seemed to end. i don't know who to confide in. every time i confide in somebody i trust it always slips out for the world to know. i will never be normal. i will never be pretty, or beautiful, or desired by anyone. i will never be loved. i will never be wanted in this world. i just don't get it. i do so much for everyone else, and in return i get this scarred life. my heart has already been broken. i'm afraid to press foreward. i long to press back, to change all that happened. to regain my sanity, my hope, my dignity. but most importantly, to be loved.
-
to be honest, this only made my innner turmoil bubble higher. i don't know what to do anymore. i can't live without wanting to die. i can't want to die without longing to live. i can't fix my past. i know i can fix my future, but i've no strength left. my hope was drained. my faith is gone. my life... it's ruined. and i know i tell everyone "don't give up, keep trying, you'll make it through." but i can't take my advice. i've already passed the limit. i'm broken. my world is broken...
-
*sigh* nobody understands me. nobody wants to. i guess that's just the way my life will be. there's nothing i can do now. i'll just have to cope with the pain...
-
I read a bit of it, and I feel your pain x( Lemme read the rest hon. But sorry you're feeling down.
-
...*dies*
sad...just so sad... -
I understand you completely.
-
yeah, i noticed that this is the only place where i'm truly understood. other than here, my world is like a living hell. thanks kaitie, for reading all that. most people would just say, "it's too long"
-
What's sucs, is that GTQ isn't all that great anymore.
-
yeah, i mean, i love you guys but things just aren't as great as they were a while back. i guess it's just that all the newbies overpowered us and kind of made themselves at home, which is fine except for the overpowering part.
-
I agree with Hikaru, but unfourtently, this place STILL is the only place where I have actual, loyal enough friends, lol.
No prob, and I understand where you're coming from completely. I uh, even did something to my wrists last night really bad that I'm regretting now because I feel so hopeless. I'm glad someone else is here to feel the same thing.
I hope everyone who's down eventually gets through it though... -
Ya, but they really don't care about anyone here. *Hugz Alanaz* I'm sorry.
-
*Hugs Hikaru and Alana*
The b00bies are sorta getting on my nerves, lol. I mean, some are fine, but... the older GTQ was a lot better. -
I know....ya, but I was the one who started all the drama on GTQ, so I guess I should have never come...
-
No, Hikaru, we freaking love you here. There are people who start a lot of s--- here, and you aren't one of them. Don't worrys.
-
No, it was a long time ago, and I was the first one to start all this sh|t, I'm sorry.....
This thread is locked, therefore no new posts can be made.
