Do not argue with an idiot.
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:18pm
Thread Topic: Do not argue with an idiot.
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Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
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Where there's a will, there's a relative.
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Laughing so hard that no sound comes out. You're left looking like a demented, clapping seal.
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I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather, not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
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How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
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Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.
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Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.
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Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars but check when you say the paint is wet?
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Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America ?
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The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!
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Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
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A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
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Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.
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