Looking back at my jerk attitude in the past, I realize smth
- Locked due to inactivity on Jun 30, '22 3:54am
Thread Topic: Looking back at my jerk attitude in the past, I realize smth
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I have realized the three main causes of the jerkiness.
1. I have ADHD and SUCK at reading text tones, it often leads me to believe someone is angry or upset with me, even if they're not, and because of my severe mental issues, my instinct was to lash out. I still have mental issues today, I just have a better understanding of them now than when I was 13.
2. I have trouble finding words. This often comes off as ME being rude. I saw something from two years ago of me saying "Now you know how I feel" when Drekk was angry. I didn't mean to sound so b----y, I was trying to sympathize. I just suck at finding words.
3. You know that whole phrase "bullies break others down to build themselves up?" A lot of times this is because bullies have a fear of seeming weak or broken, and I was definitely going through stuff at 13 years old that led to my messed up brain. Like there was a 17 year old in my neighborhood who s/xualized me and stalked me, and although I felt wrong, he manipulated me into thinking it was normal. I was physically and mentally bullied at school after I came out. My academics stressed me out, because I knew I was so much more than A's in a grade book.
To anyone I've hurt in the past with these mistakes, I'm so sorry. -
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I'm going to be honest, reading this I don't get the impression that you fully understand what you did wrong? It's great that you're trying to take accountability and that's very mature of you, but this defintley reads more as a set of excuses.
While you were a young kid, and I'm sorry you had so much on your plate none of that really explains what happened /nm /gen
I think the best way to apologise for past behaviour, is with actions and not words.
I wish you the best in your development Pepper /gen
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