Bet you didn't think that I'd come back to life stronger.
Thread Topic: Bet you didn't think that I'd come back to life stronger.
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I just know if I were to have someone new and he’d stop by and ask for another chance, I would go in a heartbeat.
And I feel like if I make new friends I would abandon them as soon as I have him back. And that’s not okay, and I don’t want that. Kinda why I don’t want anyone talking to me while I’m healing because i literally can hurt you if im still hurting -
I don’t want to be used, so I wouldn’t like to use anyone to get over this heartbreak. I want to deal with this myself, alone. I feel like it’ll just make me a lot stronger.
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But at the same time I need to talk to people in order to heal but f--- I’m so independent and f---ed up and stubborn with doing everything on my own
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That’s why I’m relying on my new hobby so much.
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I feel a lot rn
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I’m just angry because my sister gave her bf so much trouble in the beginning)pretty sure she still does) and was a f---ing handful at some point and he still stuck around even then.
My other sister gives her gf a hard time too, and even sometimes treats her like s--- in front of us and she still sticks around??
My brother is controlling with his gf and she’s still there…
But when I’m too much, get out of control, or just get so problematic, you leave. It’s embarrassing as f--- knowing that my siblings’ partners are there for them through thick and thin, but you aren’t. You make me feel like I’m worthless as f--- and not even worth the trouble at all. I feel like I’m not valuable enough to be kept even if I’m too much sometimes. I was never worth it to you, and I hate how you gave up on me so easily. -
All of us are pretty f---ing problematic. Our household is pretty f---ed up in general.
But why do I feel like everyone else gets the chance despite how broken we are, but I don’t? -
And then you go to say it’s suddenly the distance.
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You have no idea how much you broke me.
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You shattered everything about me.
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Gave me false hope. And you knew what you were doing.
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I had friends stick around longer than you put up. I had friends deal with the worst parts of me and they still stayed. Why couldn’t you, someone who is supposed to be my partner, couldn’t?
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I just don’t understand. I’m so confused.
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Do you see why I believe you used me? I have high expectations with people and I don’t let anyone in, and I trusted you with my heart and insecurities only for you to ruin me.
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I shared every part of me to you. Many people don’t even know me on a deeper level, but you did.
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