I am a loser who
- Locked due to inactivity on Jan 20, '20 3:54am
Thread Topic: I am a loser who
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Having fun with college?
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Will there ever be a day where I don’t have an existential crisis
Probably not because I like making stupid choices
Learn from me omg I’m soooo quirky rawr xD
f--- me. -
I used to have presentation and public speaking anxiety too but in college your professors don’t give a f--- if you do and will grade you according to your performance
So you better believe I turn on my customer service mode and go on auto pilot whenever I present
Friendly advice to anyone on here
Just practice in front of a mirror your script and then when doing it in front of others just pretend you’re saying it to the mirror -
Omg I didn’t see you there hi
Yeah kind of 🙃 hope your school stuff is going well -
I want sleep
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There’s a party in the dorm building next to my dorm and I’m lowkey jealous:( Tequila is probably there
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Omg no way
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Me Sees a girl with blonde hair and green eyes with freckles and knows damn well it’s not her
My brain 👁 o 👁 that looks like Lydia -
It’s because Lydia looks like every basic stoner girl 🙃
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:( I think I don’t actually have the capacity of loving someone I just like the idea of not being alone
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Just kidding i did love someone but that someone Ended their life when I was in middle school but I think that has been the closest thing I have ever felt that can be described as love even if I was just a kid
I think that’s also why I have commitment issues and jump from relationships like I’m jumping through Lili pads without giving myself me time -
Lmao bro what the duck stop making my life look like it has been hardship after hardship and dramatic as f--- let me name some good stuff that has happened bc I’m not some poor little sad boy from a garbage can and there are people who have had it worse
1- I actually had the fortune of growing up in somewhat middle upper class houses when I was a kid because my dad was part of a law firm. I lost that privilege the day I came out and got thrown to the streets though so I suppose that is my fault. I think that if I would have been normal I would still have a dad/ have him pay the portion of things I still have to pay for school. I wouldn’t need loans and would not be struggling. I’d probably be his pride and joy. Okay but the point is I had a good home and like had food and literally all the toys I wanted.
2-My dad actually did give me a present and that’s my car he said that’s the last thing I’d get from him unless I graduated college so hey at least there’s still a window there
3- I graduated high school and got a really good scholarship out of it which helped me attend the previous university I was at so ayyeee -
Going back to number 1
I think getting thrown out made me realize that the image I had of the real world was soo not it. If I would have continued to be sheltered and getting my dad to pay every single thing I would probably still be the same as I was back then and when I was truly faced with the real world I would not know how to cope -
That and I’d probably have a C average gpa or like low B average right now because I wouldn’t understand the value of an education.
High school me when I lived with my parents gave zero f---s about school. I had Cs and Bs. The minute I was dropped like a hot potato I realized that I needed to get my head in the game and study because an education is crucial to surviving.
So yeah college me would probably be trash rn. -
there’s also that portion of my younger years where I lived on the other side of the planet but I genuinely have so many anxiety inducing memories and trauma from that continent that I just don’t even acknowledge the fact that I lived there with my family.
So yeah. America has been good on me. It’s just that I’m a dumb hoe who makes bad choices. Im working on becoming a functional adult though
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