My official thread
- Locked due to inactivity on Mar 3, '19 3:54am
Thread Topic: My official thread
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I feel nothing, and I barely think. Even when I'm having fun it never shows because I'm the inside I'm empty
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I don't feel love
I don't feel happiness
I don't feel anger
I occasionally feel deep sadness -
It's like living in a silent room with occasional songs in my head
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I wasn't even happy when I saw the sloths at the zoo. Or when we went to an amusement park.
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Things are only getting worse. The person I thought needed me has a boyfriend, so I'm not needed any longer. My grandfather who is like a father to me doesn't even know who I am anymore. My grandma has so much to deal with, she is truly an angel. But she doesn't need me as a burden. My youngest brother has his older brother to count on. And the oldest brother has my grandma.
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I mean I guess I promised uncle Jimmy that I wouldn't do anything like ODing again.
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My parents wouldn't even know I'm dead. They don't know I was in the hospital. All of my friends have friends that are better. And the other kids wouldn't even notice if I was gone. We're "at the bottom of the food chain" like Kiki said.
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Plus, I know when I grow up, I'll be unhappy because I'm not smart enough to do what I want to do, and not creative enough for my plan B.
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May i say something?
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I'm not even really myself. Many quality I have isn't better than anyone else's in the friend group. Funny? No, Nathan is funnier. Smart? Hell no, all of my friends are in way more smarter, they are all in honors classes. I'm in one. Plus, I have an IEP. Creative? Nope. Keri is a better writer. I can't do sports, can't act, can't sing, can't dance can't play an instrument. Nothing about me is different or cool.
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Huh? Oh hey! What's up?
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Just waiting
But as for this whole u being unhappy when ur older thing i have something to add -
Ah. How are you?
Okay. -
You can add on if you want
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I am meh
I know how that feels but trust me on this when u get ur first job and u keep that job for a year or even 6 months then u simply start to enjoy it
Like me when i first started working i knew nothing about hardware i knew what a basic wrench was and pliers etc but now the only kinda job i really want to do is hardware sales so yeah just let life happen and perhaps it turns out cool
However i myself am not happh i am content with my life if i get this job then yay but i wont be happy id just be content the 1 thing i want more than anything i cant have
Also quite afew trolls popping up
Also why is everyone i used to talk to ignoring me??
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