Horse's offical thread!!!!!!!
- Locked due to inactivity on Jun 23, '18 3:54am
Thread Topic: Horse's offical thread!!!!!!!
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I'm honestly really sorry snipe. A lot of people get my story wrong, I didn't start from being where I am today. I started from rock bottom. My Mom was pregnant with me when my own father abused her. He hated me from when he even knew I existed. My Mom was working at McDonald's because he wouldn't let her get another job and went into labor at her job. fast forward three years, my biological father has bene out of my life due to jail and a restraining order, my mom is getting married to my step-father who is a different race than I, which I don't mind but I hate everyone assuming things and asking questions about my biological father, it upsets me. I am three and can't go against them getting married. Throughout all my life up until 6th grade I was bullied for being chubby, when really I was chubby but not fat. Being chubby was caused by a weight gaining disease which was genetic and was passed to me. I was bullied so much I had legit lost the will to live but my grandfather was battling lung cancer and was in the hospital with the flu and pneumonia for almost a year. My grandmother and my mom couldn't pay for the hospital bills because my mom was also going to college at the time. My grandfather was my rock and strength through all my depression. He passed away at the end of my 6th grade year. I was tired of being bullied, so I stopped eating. I became anorexic. I now wear a size medium and have frequent relapses. I started wearing makeup and actually trying to be pretty, I rarely went outside of my house that summer because I wanted to show everyone that didn't see me during the summer I am more than what they thought I was. I didn't tell my mother about the bullying either. I was the strength for our family so I had to be strong. I wanted to die but I knew it would be worse on my family so I sacrificed being happy and made them happy. I secretly cut and it was a frequent thing. I have a few scars that didn't go away with my medicine, but I no longer cut. My parents don't know I ever did. In this time, my mom got a high paying job due to her grades on standardized testing and I lost four really close family members that which made me even more depressed. I started back to school and being popular wasn't all I had hoped. I was talked about on the daily because of jealously, which I hated. I recently had to move states because my mother got an even bigger promotion. After all my work, I had to leave my home and make new friends who didn't know my past and I didn't want to tell them. Today as my mom and I were heading home from my softball workouts, I tried to talk to her about my depression and how I used to be suicidal. Her exact words were "I will slap you across your face next time you say something like that. Suicide and depression is not a dang joke!!" Little did she know that one of my close friends that went to a separate school then me killed himself. I wasn't joking with her. Me and her haven't talked since. Don't get me wrong I love my momma and all but this really hurt. I don't want any pity or I'm sorry I just wanted you to know when I say "I understand" or give you confidence, its because I have been in your shoes. We all have the same battles with just different demons.
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Uhm
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I will give u my history some time
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So if like to say sorry for being a lil brat yesterday
I was tired frustrated worried and well stressed out i had alot on my mind -
Id not if 😑
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Its okay, we all have those days
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Shut up
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? What did I even do?
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The alpha wolf 4 NewbieHey
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Damn
Can anybody take a joke? -
I'm tired and its been a while
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Ugh I have a volleyball game tomorrow, a concert at a really fancy church for choir ( I rlly dread this), softball practice Saturday, and a softball game Monday
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The alpha wolf 6 NewbieHey
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hey
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The alpha wolf 6 NewbieSup
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