Show me where my armour ends, show me where my skin begins
- Locked by Dark22978 on Dec 31, '17 10:07pmReason: Owner's request. Starting anew.
Thread Topic: Show me where my armour ends, show me where my skin begins
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i live like, an hour away from there
please come find me and kill me i'm suffering -
peach tea monsters are gross and if you disagree you're gay
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Ohhh I'm like right near there lol. At least, I'm here for another week and then I leave again. People in pcb call it pcb.
Sorry, I can't come find you, I'm lazy and an hour is too long. -
ahhhhh the beaches are really pretty aren't they? i've actually never been to pier park during Christmas. what are you there for?
lololol okay well come kill me tomorrow -
someone in the gc was like "wait brandilynn... rahshawn is black"
and i was like "??? esy?" -
i can't find the video i'm looking for and i'm really upset
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They're pretty in the late spring, summer, and early fall, but around winter time it gets really cloudy. But no one's here, so it's nice that there's no traffic. I'm here for my winter break
I gotchu -
i get so shook when my coworkers call me brandi like that is. not. my. f---ing. name. and i just want that to be respected.
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mmmm im pissed off now so im gonna get off
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i mean at least i don't blame my disorders on other people soooo
like im unhealthy but i know it's not anyone's fault but my own
Natalie needs to stfu like -
i get so heated each time i think about her telling parys she was the reason that she was self harming and it makes me so sad honestly and i don't know if nat ever got the help she needed but i hope she did
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or when i think about how julianna told me that i gave her a panic disorder and i was like "kay"
i mean i used to think i was an open book but tbh i've only ever told like.. three people everything and
idk it's hard -
like there are things that parys doesn't know and i'm trying so, so, so hard not to hide stuff from her and to tell her when i'm hurting but like
it's hard for me to trust her and i hate i t -
okay but
see the thing is
I could have the attitude where I say "f--- all the people who have ever hurt me" and blame everything on the fact that i've been left over, and over, and over, and over again by people who PROMISED to love me and PROMISED not to leave. I could blame my issues on everyone who f---ed me over. I could hate them and let it eat me alive.
and i used to do that and sometimes i still do but
i also know that it isn't true and a lot of it is my fault. like i have a lot of issues and my mental health isn't great. part of it is chemical deficiencies, like i'm supposed to take pills to correct it but they make me feel like clay inside so i don't. and part of it IS everything that's been done to me and all the times i've been hurt and left behind and had my trust broken. but it's also partly just because of the mentality that i allow myself to have -
and i'm trying so hard to correct it and trying to be a better person and like
getting better is hard. healing is hard. it's so difficult and sometimes i think it's impossible but if I were to step back and look at how far I've come, how many people see the changes i've made and appreciate them
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