Vote 4 my cringe
- Locked due to inactivity on Nov 17, '17 3:54am
Thread Topic: Vote 4 my cringe
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Also do not self harm
That's bad 2 -
:( they're active right now.
Probably BC they're texting someone else.
Sigh. -
So f---ing pissed off.
-
When I get pissed off I cry like an idiot and just contemplate my existence
Sigh -
;-; you make me feel like I'm worthless
Like
I never said anything about an open relationship because I'm committed to one person only yet you're over here wanting to get back with Adam even though you said hdjfhdhsbxbdn
You know what f--- you I can't even type right now I'm the type of angry where you can't even use words because you're too busy crying and just
I HAVE NOT CRIED LIKE THIS SINCE 2014 OKAY WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU A GIRLFRIEND IS NOT SUPPOSED TO MAKE HER BOYFRIEND CRY
Yet you're over here making me scribble on myself "I'm a moron" because you say you're ugly and make me bring you around to reality but while you do this you just bring me down
What the f--- is wrong with you -
You're not ugly okay
And I know you know that because if you thought you were ugly you would not be posting pictures of yourself every f---ing two days onto Facebook wanting to get likes because if you're self conscience you would not even want a single camera near you and like
I f---ing hate myself right now -
Nothing is wrong with you the one with the issues is me
Because I'm f---ing stupid and idiotic and have no self value which is why I stick around with you okay
Because it's not you who feels like s--- in the relationship
Its me
I have come to the point in life where I see myself as a piece of human garbage that if I leave you no one else will ever want me and I'll be single forever
That's why I am so attached and I use the "oh you'll kill yourself" thing as a f---ing excuse in my mind to stay -
I'm f---ing garbage I swear I wasn't this unstable when we first met I don't know what happened
I just know that I need to stay away from dating for a while because how can I ever love another human being/ let them love me if I can't even love or see Any value myself -
Why are you crying
Stop it
Sigh
I don't know how to break up with a person. -
See I've only broken up 2 relationships and that was over text and because they were just tied onto me when there were so many other people around them and tbh that was almost two/ three years ago so I don't really remember how it happened
The other one well Misty f---ing "killed herself by jumping off a f---ing roof" and even though have of you say that she lied about that on this site it really did shock and leave me numb for a good chunk of time because I felt guilty about it by a lot
I don't know if she was lying about the cancer or not but yeah
I felt like garbage and to this day still do -
*half
All I know is that relationships are not what I thought they would be and honestly at the rate s--- has been going I think from now on I'll just keep my feelings to myself because I keep making the same mistakes and not learning from them. -
Not only am I hurting myself but I'm also hurting those who are unfortunate enough to stumble into me.
All I know for now is that Lidia and I can no longer be together. Two emotional wrecks in a tie with each other is a recipe for disaster -
'All I know'
What the f--- do you know Jae
Nothing.
Sigh
Just going to listen to music for a while or something I need to stop -
I have created three different ways to break up with this person and every single time I recite the lines I'm going to say I just end up screaming the words out and bursting into tears as I explain that the reason I'm leaving them is because I don't want to hurt or be hurt even though I am hurting them when saying these lines and that the only reason my dumb--- got into a relationship with them was to forget someone and although that someone is long gone from my heart the memories still stay and I'm not enough of a person to take responsibility for my actions so I just blame it on other people and things because I'm trash I am having a midlife crisis and they don't have a damn clue because they're too busy online with their streams and their games and their virtual friends that they don't f---ing realize that high school ends in six weeks for them and that during summer they'll be in college and other people will be around there that will be able to do so much more with them
Right now you're happy with just minimal contact but in the future I know you'll want more and that's not going to happen
I live in a different world from you and have different goals in life
I know you probably don't understand and I wish I could explain but I'm not sure how that's done -
I have not had the desire to die in a while.
Like I'm seriously contemplating climbing up onto the top part of my old closet and using that rope to hang myself.
I don't see the point and I don't know how to explain this relationship I'm mentally ill and so are you we need help
I don't mean to be an emo attention whore or trigger anyone with my posts but I just
I need some place to type all of this okay
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