I like to visit Satan
- Locked due to inactivity on Jul 27, '17 3:54am
Thread Topic: I like to visit Satan
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I have multiple ideas in MInd but I'm too tired to get up and start them
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This is fine
Having multiple breakdowns in my mind Atm
But this is ok -
Just shove them into the corner of ur mind and ur good.
Moving on
:c crippling anxiety. -
Oh f--- tomorrow's a half day and I'm about to kill myself because the IG inspection is in a month and the files aren't done and if I'm the officer next year I'm going to have to start training and preparing to lead the others but tbh if they're like lol no f--- off even though I'm a staff sergeant I'm going to cry because I did not waste three years of my life with boring hair just to not get noticed IDC how many times I've moved I have my stuff together ok
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I hate ROTC with a burning passion.
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Ten seconds later
I love ROTC
Honestly I'm not really sure why I'm even in ROTC anymore
Like -
I enjoy the power and the adrenaline you feel when you're at attention during con and being observed along with the ribbons and decorations you are given
But like
Why -
They're not helping Me in any way other than they look good on college applications
Tbh no one cares about others in this program and if you have a relationship it's to be in the program so that you can skip to higher ranks and get leadership positions
Like no one talks about this but this is the f---ing bull s--- that goes on behind that office hatch
Once that human doesn't need you or you don't need them they leave and depending on who has more power they can even drop you a level by taking your command away
Of course though we're all total angels and machines of discipline that do as we're told in the eyes of the rest of the school. -
Hypocrisy everywhere m8
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s--- I'm having another one of those creepy revelation moments again where I stop thinking about my life and start to observe and talk about the things happening around me
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I'm talking about being officer when I just recently poked two f---ing holes in my mouth even though we're not supposed to have facial piercings
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I don't want to get rid of them though
Like
I really like how they look and they cost me a lot of pain okay like
;0; if I try to get them out they'll close up and I'll be left with nothing -
I don't give a f---.
I'm tired of being a repressed human I want to be like all the other kids that go all rawr XD with hair and piercings and all this program is doing is telling me not to do that because it's eccentric -
But my rank
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Okay so my plan for snake bites was getting clear ones so that when they were okay to change I could go ahead and pop in the black ones I currently had in but then my piercer was like oh no we don't have those here we have all these colors though and I was like okay kms and got black because I was like oh drop out mate
But then commanders were like yeah no we're thinking of you being officer next year and I was like kms no way
I hate my life.
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