93 million miles
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:27pm
Thread Topic: 93 million miles
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[DOCUMENT RECENTLY UNCLASSIFIED]
On the night of October 28th, 2012 a research team composed by [EXPUNGED] was sent to capture and modify the satellite [EXPUNGED] to study a solar phenomenon. The six man team consisted of [EXPUNGED], [EXPUNGED], [EXPUNGED], [EXPUNGED], [EXPUNGED], and Colonel Andrew Griegh. The following documents are the recorded messages of Col. Griegh.
[10/29/12]
-Begin Log entry number one. Col. Andrew Griegh. ID number 002028792.
So far so good. [EXPUNGED] got a little sick from the take off. Her spirit hasnt been shaken yet though. She keeps ranting on about how we could be saving humanity by doing this. (pauses for a moment) The rest of the team doesnt seem so excited. [EXPUNGED] is scared hell never see his family again. Says that the only reason he joined the mission was because [EXPUNGED] asked him to come. [EXPUNGED] asked us all to come. I dont think this mission would even be going underway if they hadnt. Were reaching the first docking station now. Griegh signing off.-
[10/31/12]
-Begin Log entry number five. Col. Andrew Griegh. ID number 002028792.
The team seems more nervous now. We just caught the satellite and will be beginning altercations in two hours. [EXPUNGED] is put off by the silence. She says she misses home. Even [EXPUNGED] is running out of peppy things to say. Supplies are holding up well and so far everything is going according to plan. But I guess if people were going to feel creeped out, that this would be the season. Happy Halloween everybody. Griegh signing off.-
[10/31/12] Just 23 minutes after the previous message ended. Audible yelling can be heard in the background.
-Log six. Col. Griegh. ID number 0020- whatever.
[EXPUNGED] and [EXPUNGED] just got in to a fight. [EXPUNGED] ended up clawing out [EXPUNGED]s eye. [EXPUNGED] is trying to patch it up the best he can with the first aid we have up here. It took [EXPUNGED] and [EXPUNGED] to hold [EXPUNGED] down and even then she managed to break [EXPUNGED]s finger. She keeps screaming that [EXPUNGED] is planning on killing us all.
(at this point another crewmen can be heard calling for Greigh)
Oh shi- COMING! Griegh out-
Over the next seven hours no crew member accesses their logs. Records show that their ship suffers severe structural damage including power outages, engine failures, and finally a rapid cabin depressurization. Finally after seven hours of silence, a message is received by Griegh. -
[11/1/12]
-Hello? Is this thing working now? Oh you all can hear me. Umm (silence)
Begin Log entry number.. (thinking) number seven. Col. Andrew Griegh. ID number 0020.. 28792.
The ship is gone. [EXPUNGED] just started taking us down one by one. We subjected that [EXPLICATIVE DELETED] with enough morphine to drop a horse. Yet she would just get back up and start again. She took [EXPUNGED]s other eye first. She left him there as she then went on to kill [EXPUNGED] and [EXPUNGED].
(Griegh can be heard crying for the next several minutes)
After she finished with them, we were able to drop her for a few minutes. [EXPUNGED] had to break her arm and bear hug her while I injected her with over 250 cc of Morphine. Enough to kill a person. I went in to the cockpit to grab the backup first aid kit. I thought I could still save the others. When I came back I saw [EXPUNGED] hunched over [EXPUNGED]. Her teeth sunk in to his neck. I locked the cockpit door. In my panic I forgot that [EXPUNGED] was still in there with her. He was still strapped down to the medical table with medical gauss over his eyes. I watched through the port hole as talked to him as she put one of the space suits on. It wasnt until she put on the helmet that I could hear over the radio what she was saying. She was telling him what she did to the others. She then put a helmet on him and unstrapped him. She grabbed him by the neck and pinned his visor up against the door. (silence)
Thats when she depressurized the cabin. (the audio abruptly ends)
(43 seconds later)
-Damn faulty mic. I think Ive got it working again now. Anyways, [EXPUNGED] wasnt wearing a suit like [EXPUNGED]. He only had a helmet. When the cabin depressurized, he didnt die from his lungs collapsing... He died from his blood boiling
[11/2/12]
-28 seconds. He screamed for 28 seconds. After he stopped screaming, she repressurized the cabin. Then she (silence) she started eating I threw up. I couldnt watch. I curled up on the floor and passed out. I woke up to a loud tapping sound. I dont know how long I sat there scared to look through the porthole. When I did I vomited again. She had propped everyones bodies around the room. From what I could tell, she had eaten all of their fingers, toes, ears, eye lids, and noses. From the surgical bag, she had taken a rubber mallet and a scalpel and was attempting to nail through the porthole. The part that scared me the most was she was winning
I had to act fast. I stayed out of view for as long as I could. I took one of the spare space suits from the cockpit and put it on. I also sabotaged the console so it wouldnt activate. I disassembled it until I found what I was looking for. I found a heavy metal rod and something hard to hit it with. I was prepa-
(Three minutes of static)
-There. I think I fixed it. Where was I Oh yeah. I was prepared. The second she broke through the porthole, I took my metal rod and I broke through the front window of the ship. The glass shattered as the ship redepressurized. I was flung out. I watched as [EXPUNGED]s head was pulled through the porthole and her stomach and lungs were pulled out of her mouth. I could swear that [EXPLICATIVE DELETED] was still staring at me as I flew away.
[11/3/12]
I must have hit my helmet on the way out. Theres a small crack on the visor. I also found out that these suits have a system where they can tell how long it takes my messages to reach earth and feeds me the information as a distance in kilometers. As of right now at 400,278 kilometers from earth, I am now further from home than any man has ever been before. -
[11/4/12]
Im plotted my trajectory as best I can. From the looks of things Im approximately nine million miles from the sun. Given my rate of travel right now that means Ill get there in about a year. Lucky for me, if this crack in my screen doesnt kill me long before then, than the starvation, or air recycling system going down will. In any case Ive come to a sound conclusion; if there is such a thing as Angels, eternity would have drove them mad long ago.
[11/7/12]
The hunger is really starting to get to me. With no response on the radio, I think Im starting to hear things. Voices.
[11/9/12]
The crack on my visor has gotten a little bigger. I also just hit the five hundred thousand kilometer mark. I figure that if Im going to die out here, that I should at least give the best scientific analyses that I can while Im doing it. Im not sure whats going on, but Im looking at the space between the stars and I can swear Im seeing shapes in them. Weird blurry shapes but shapes none the less. Ill update when I have information.
[11/12/12]
I tried to kill myself today. When I turned to face the sun, I tried to lift my sun guard. My neck and chin blistered instantly and I dropped the visor before I could kill myself.
[11/14/12]
I am positive that there are shapes in the darkness between stars. Cloud like shapes. I spend most of my time watching them anymore.
[11/16/12]
Why am I not dead yet.
[11/19/12] (Griegh seems to be talking to himself in his sleep and has activated his microphone.)
I dont know what you mean..
Its okay I deserve it anyway
I love you too angels..
[11/22/12]
I am sure I am going crazy. Due to dehydration and starvation, most of my bodily functions have shut themselves down. I can still move, talk, and breath, although at this point Im not sure how clear the air Im breathing is. I can also see. I can see all the beauty there is before me.
[11/28/12]
(Griegh spends 2 hours screaming in to his microphone. No decipherable words can be heard during this time.)
[12/1/12] (Griegh has now been alive in a space suit for over a month and is at a distance of 930,000 kilometers from earth.)
They say that people who are on the brink of death have spiritual revelations. Well I talked with God, and he isnt happy with us.
[12/3/12]
The blisters on my chin and neck have still yet to start healing. Even if this were caused by the starvation, they should show some sign of getting better. The part that worries me the most is that they dont hurt anymore.
[12/13/12]
YES! I am sure of it! There are voices on the radio! They said my name! Told me it would be alright! Im sure theyre right! They must be the angels!
[12/14/12]
The angels are mad that I told you about them. They say I should stop talking with you now
(TO BE CONTINUED) -
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It's kind of confusing and has a flat tone. The actual horror has good detail but I don't really know what's going on....
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Gauging this as a writer I have absolute no merit in critiquing actual parts of this in terms of literary devices but I can say that it's better than the drivel I usually see here. it's suspenseful and I f---ing want more and I want to see what's next
I found this in no way confusing or flat. its a journey into the mind of a lost astronaut who in all circumstances should be dead. It's mind horror and often isn't for the impatient that want action. If you read this and put yourself in the place of the astronaut, you'll see what I mean.
I have a little animation going on in me head of this and I'm a little scared of how detailed it is tbh. -
What does EXPUNGED mean? How is the dude still alive...wouldn't he float away???
Ps. Sorry if I sounded rude, I didn't mean to be :) I have a head ache and reading something which requires brain power isn't too easy... -
EXPUNGED means deleted.
And he is floating away. In space. The dude is wondering why he hasn't died yet. (i think this is bordering on a fantasy/horror/suspense described in the format of journals and such. things aren't true to life already as described with the crazy human eating monster chick person)
No problem, I have a huge headache to. I have a thing for writing formatted like this. -
Oh :) I feel really silly!
What's happening at the beginning? Why does the lady lunitic murder...how did she get on the space craft? -
This was just a rough draft. I wanted to make it seem like an unclassified document but I can see already that makes it hard to follow. The crazed lady was another member of the team. The really peppy one at the beginning.
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Oh :/
My brain's slowly switching off...so I'll read it again later :) -
Wow, very suspensful and engaging. I enjoyed it, and I don't usually like stories formatted this way as well. Good job, I can't wait to read more!
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I'm confused
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Any suggestions for what I should do to continue or revise this story?
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brump
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