An ending at Hogwarts part 13 | Comments

I agree with the dialogue bit, and all what @music826 and @vulturemonem said. It isn't easy to write, and very difficult to make it sound natural. Considering dialogue is the most problematic part of my writing as well (though I think it has improved a lot since I started), I'm not sure whether I'm the right person to point it out, but this is coming from me as a reader, not a writer. Anyway, I've read your previous editions as well, and I agree your series is a bit different from usual Harry Potter/ Romance fan fiction, especially as starting from sixth year instead of the third. I'm not judging your writing at this stage because I'd need to read some detailed writing from you to form any opinion of the sort, but I think you should add more descriptions to make for smooth reading.

Anyway, looking forward to the next part! :)

This is certainly a different take on your normal Harry Potter, romance-y fanfiction. For starters, you began with the sixth year, which was pretty original. The whole thing is very different, especially with the main character not really having many friends, except those that you've invented, Draco and the twins. A very interesting twist!

I'll offer you a quick bit of advice. Work a little on your dialogue. Dialogue is very difficult to write, and it's difficult to make it sound natural. Read over it, and maybe read it out loud. Does it sound right? If not, how would you reply to the previous bit of speech?

See what I mean? Good luck with your series!

@bananabread I'm not really sure what to add from what @vulturemonem said. I do agree on the dialogue bit, and that will probably become more and more natural the longer you write. Anyway, I'm so glad to see you're writing again and I can't wait for part 14!