Which Professional Cyclist are you?

So what world famous pro cyclist are you? Wanna know? Take the quiz. It'll tell you! Ready kid? You can do it! You might even surprise yourself! Is this paragraph long enough yet? What more can we say?

So let's get going kids. Kind out if your personality will make you the next Geert Steegmans. Never mind, you want to be the next Geer Steegmans? Why? Ride your bike 40 hours a week. You'll still suck we promise.

What is your age?
	Under 18 Years Old
	18 to 24 Years Old
	25 to 30 Years Old
	31 to 40 Years Old
	41 to 50 Years Old
	51 to 60 Years Old
	Over 60 Years Old
What is your gender?
	Male
	Female
How tall are you?
	I'm so short my feet don't even touch the ground.
	Average for a midget.
	The perfect height as outlined in the 1968 CONI manual
	If white men could jump, I'd be posting up on Yao Ming
Have you ever had health issues due to non-recreational use of illegal substances.
	You don't think I had that testicle removed for the Nike endorsement do you?
	Does severe mental depression, coupled with suicidal tendencies and delusions of grandeur count?
	My chin now reaches my hgh potbelly but other than that no.
	No. I'm a healthy handsome man.
Do people ever call you doctor?
	Yes and I don't understand why.
	No
	Call me doctor? I'll frucking sue you b----. Get Thom Weisel on my phone now!
Do Belgian children hang pictures of you on their walls?
	yes, and their mothers hide them under their mattresses.
	I am not a Doctor.
	Only if they know what's good for them.
Describe your haircut.
	Bathtub Mowhawk
	Euro-Mullet
	Flock of Seagulls
	Crew cut
Describe your favorite type of sporting event.
	A Belgian Cobbled Classic
	The race around Paris Hilton's pillow case.
	One that involves the least amount of thinking; preferably against out-classed juveniles chasing the $10,000 dream.
	a west flandrian pigeon race. my veternarian said it would be good place to find the newest forms of help for my bikegame.
Your hermatocrit is:
	Naturally high and you have the doctor's note to prove it.
	The subject of an ongoing criminal investigation.
	What forces you to set alarm clocks at tow hour intervels while you sleep to prevent cardiac arrest.
	None of your business. Quite trying to ruin the sport you frucking communist.
	Mine or my dogs?
My nickname is:
	Gowth Hormone
	Doctor Davey
	Sheryl's Crow
	whatever is Flemish for Froot Loop
	Mr. World Champion
Have you ever won a Rainbow jersey?
	Yes
	No
	Once in P-Town, but it was more of a rainbow mu-mu
Who would your ideal director be?
	Pharoh Ferretti
	Johan Bruyneel
	Doctor Ferrari
	Patrick LeFevre

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